Cover Snark (176): Right of First Snark

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don’t write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I’ve linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

Please note that you should by no means contact the author if you do not like their cover; they likely have ZERO control. Feel free to express opinions in the comments, but please do not @ an author on Twitter because of anything you’ve seen here. Let’s keep it kind.

Shiny and New:

1. The Bloodsworn (Bloodbound #3) – Erin Lindsey
The Bloodsworn (Bloodbound #3) - Erin Lindsey
Thoughts: Always here for lady knights. This looks so much like Alanna that I can’t.

2. This Is Our Story – Ashley Elston
This Is Our Story - Ashley Elston
Thoughts: Oh god, this makes me think of Cabin in the Woods. Also, lolololol that one shadow person has a deer head.

3. Iron to Iron (Wolf by Wolf #1.5) -Ryan Graudin
Iron to Iron (Wolf by Wolf #1.5) -Ryan Graudin
Thoughts: Is that like from the frying pan into the frying pan?

4. Heartless – Marissa Meyer
Heartless - Marissa Meyer
Thoughts: TBQH, I find this disappointing after the beauty of the Lunar Chronicles covers. Maybe it will be nice printed but online it falls flat.

5. The Untimely Deaths of Alex Wayfare (Alex Wayfare #2) – M.G. Buehrlen
The Untimely Deaths of Alex Wayfare (Alex Wayfare #2) - M.G. Buehrlen
Thoughts: The skull in the back is a nice touch but mostly it’s just font, and not a particularly compelling one. Like the color, though.

6. Flashfall – Jenny Moyer
Flashfall - Jenny Moyer
Thoughts: It’s not so much that you shouldn’t cross the cliff boundary so much as you will go splat if you do.

7. Spindle – Shonna Slayton
Spindle - Shonna Slayton
Thoughts: Why is this cover a rose with a spotlight on it? Real question.

8. Nemesis – Anna Banks
Nemesis - Anna Banks
Thoughts: So the intro to the reveal said this book was inspired by ancient egypt. But that girl is whiiiiiite. Setting aside the fact that the silver-dyed girl is odd anyway, I’m not thrilled about this.

9. Witch’s Pyre (The Worldwalker Trilogy #3) – Josephine Angelini
Witch's Pyre - Josephine Angelini
Thoughts: In this case meaning a pyre witches set, because they’re clearly not getting burned on it.

10. Ghosts – Raina Telgemeier
Ghosts - Raina Telgemeier
Thoughts: The one girl’s like AW YEAH and the other is like GUH.

11. Wolf Hollow – Lauren Wolk
Wolf Hollow - Lauren Wolk
Thoughts: On the one hand, I love the trees of text, but also I just spent so long sitting here reading that.

12. The Problem with Forever – Jennifer L. Armentrout
The Problem with Forever - Jennifer L. Armentrout
Thoughts: If it were up to me, the word secret could never be used in a tagline ever again. However, this is lovely so whatever.

13. Greta and the Lost Army (Mylena Chronicles #3) – Chloe Jacobs
Greta and the Lost Army (Mylena Chronicles #3) - Chloe Jacobs
Thoughts: Can we talk about how much cover help Entangled needs? Like, this is just not okay.

14. The Salvation State – Marcus Damanda
The Salvation State - Marcus Damanda
Thoughts: These two teens are acting out two different music videos rn.

15. Rey’s Story (Star Wars: The Force Awakens) – Elizabeth Schaefer
Rey's Story (Star Wars The Force Awakens)
Thoughts: Damn straight.

16. Girl in Pieces – Kathleen Glasgow
Girl in Pieces - Kathleen Glasgow
Thoughts: I keep wanting to see another image behind the title, but it’s really not coming together for me.

17. Love in B Minor – Elodie Nowodazkij
Love in B Minor - Elodie Nowodazkij
Thoughts: Hey, so I can’t tell where this book is set.” “Let’s have the male model hold a piece of paper with the Eiffel Tower on it!” “Hmmmm, not cute enough.” “How about if we make the paper heart-shaped?”

18. Fear My Mortality (Mortal Eternity #1) – Everly Frost
Fear My Mortality (Mortal Eternity #1) - Everly Frost
Thoughts: Not sure why I’d worry about YOUR mortality.

19. Elite (Hunter #2) – Mercedes Lackey
Elite (Hunter #2) - Mercedes Lackey
Thoughts: This monster looks kinda weird and those flames are ridic, but I still kinda like it for some reason idk.

20. Right of First Refusal (Radleigh University #2) – Dahlia Adler
Right of First Refusal - Dahlia Adler
Thoughts: Clearly her first refusal was to wake up.

21. Losing at Love (Outer Banks Tennis Academy #2) – Jennifer Iacopelli
Losing at Love (Outer Banks Tennis Academy #2) - Jennifer Iacopelli
Thoughts: TENNIS PUN.

22. The Secret of Letting Go – Katherine Fleet
The Secret of Letting Go - Katherine Fleet
Thoughts: Hmm, okay, Entangled did better on this one. Generic still but better.

23. The Courage Test – James Preller
The Courage Test - James Preller
Thoughts: This is a test of how awesome middle grade covers can be. Spoiler: very awesome.

24. The Forgetting – Sharon Cameron
The Forgetting - Sharon Cameron
Thoughts: The Forgetting Tree? Is this the demon cousin of The Giving Tree?

25. A Tragic Kind of Wonderful – Eric Lindstrom
A Tragic Kind of Wonderful - Eric Lindstrom
Thoughts: Beautiful colors. I dig it.

26. Jessie’s Girl – Lindy Zart
Jessie's Girl - Lindy Zart
Thoughts: This is adorably silly.

27. The Odds of Lightning – Jocelyn Davies
The Odds of Lightning - Jocelyn Davies
Thoughts: Shockingly fabulous.

28. Romeo and/or Juliet: A Chooseable-Path Adventure – Ryan North
Romeo and or Juliet - Ryan North
Thoughts: Thumbs and/or Up.

29. The Bone Queen (The Books of Pellinor #1) – Alison Croggon
The Bone Queen (The Books of Pellinor #1) - Alison Croggon
Thoughts: Queen of Blood and Orgies.

30. The Case of the Blue Violet: A Murder Most Unladylike Mini Mystery (Wells and Wong #3.5) – Robin Stevens
The Case of the Blue Violet - Robin Stevens
Thoughts: Those violets are just regular violet violets.

31. Reader, I Dumped Him – Lorelei Mathias
Reader, I Dumped Him - Lorelei Mathias
Thoughts: This is the right thing to do with Rochester.

32. The Unmoving Sky – K.L. Hallam
The Unmoving Sky - K.L. Hallam
Thoughts: Say what you like, title, but the sky is OBVIOUSLY FALLING.

33. Girl in the Shadows (Girl on a Wire) – Gwenda Bond
Girl in the Shadows - Gwenda Bond
Thoughts: Most awesome. Though I’m laughing at the anatomical heart randomly chilling at the bottom.

34. Midnight Without a Moon – Linda Williams Jackson
Midnight Without a Moon - Linda Williams Jackson
Thoughts: Ironically, the title forms a moon on the supposedly moonless night.

35. The Changelings – Christina Soontornvat
The Changelings - Christina Soontornvat
Thoughts: That’s one huge raccoon.

36. Lotus and Thorn – Sara Wilson Etienne
Lotus and Thorn - Sara Wilson Etienne
Thoughts: I want to love it but hmmm. The tagline and title font are meh.

37. Bloodline – Claudia Gray
Bloodline - Claudia Gray
Thoughts: Here comes the GENERAL.

38. Blood for Blood (Wolf by Wolf #2) – Ryan Graudin
Blood for Blood (Wolf by Wolf #2) - Ryan Graudin
Thoughts: THAT WOLF.

39. Wish – Barbara O’Connor
Wish - Barbara O'Connor
Thoughts: That dog better not die.

40. The Otherlife – Julia Gray
The Other Life - Julia Gray
Thoughts: Always here for wolf covers, even if the wolves are made up of neon lines and have swirly eyes.

41. City of Spies (Pagan Jones #2) – Nina Berry
City of Spies - Nina Berry
Thoughts: This is so borrrrrring.

Cover Battles:

1. The Progeny (Descendants of the Blood Countess #1) – Tosca Lee

The Progeny - Tosca Lee original
The Progeny - Tosca Lee

Original vs. Redesign: I guess I’ll take the mask over the giant floaty face.

2. Soulless (The Parasol Protectorate #1) – Gail Carriger

Print
Soulless (The Parasol Protectorate #1) - Gail Carriger redesign
Soulless (The Parasol Protectorate #1) - Gail Carriger

Original vs. Redesign vs. Limited Edition: Eight tentacles way way up.

3. My Favourite Manson Girl – Alison Umminger

American Girls - Alison Umminger
My Favourite Manson Girl - Alison Umminger

US vs. Australian: These titles worry me. American Girls = Manson girls???

4. Carry On – Rainbow Rowell

Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Carry On - Rainbow Rowell

UK Original vs. UK Redesign: Damn it. They finally make a Rowell-style cover but I own the one I don’t like. 🙁

5. Game. Set. Match. – Jennifer Iacopelli

Game. Set. Match. - Jennifer Iacopelli original
Game. Set. Match. - Jennifer Iacopelli

Original vs. Redesign: SO MUCH BETTER. ACE REDESIGN.

6. A Court of Mist and Fury (A Court of Thorns and Roses #2) – Sarah J. Maas

A Court of Mist and Fury (A Court of Thorns and Roses #2) - Sarah J. Maas
A Court of Mist and Fury (A Court of Thorns and Roses #2) - Sarah J. Maas uk

US vs. UK: Background or no background, my eyes are drawn immediately to her boobs.

7. And the Trees Crept In – Dawn Kurtagich

The Creeper Man - Dawn Kurtagich
And the Trees Crept In - Dawn Kurtagich

UK vs. US: It’s weird how unnatural this looks when they did a photoshoot. BUT I love the trees and the font. I don’t really like The Creeper Man but it is way creepier so idk.

8. Half a War (Shattered Sea #3) – Joe Abercrombie

Half a War - Joe Abercrombie hardback
Half a War - Joe Abercrombie

UK Hardback vs. UK Paperback: Holy shit that hardback was the worst.

9. The Notorious Pagan Jones (Pagan Jones #1) – Nina Berry

The Notorious Pagan Jones - Nina Berry
The Notorious Pagan Jones - Nina Berry

US Hardback vs. US Paperback: That feel when you like the original cover better. 🙁

WTF of the Week:

WTF of the Week began as a special category for one cover I saw, but was so popular it became a recurring feature. Here, I highlight covers, both new and old, that I’ve found, which, upon viewing, made me either snort or say something along the lines of “Dear God, what is that thing?”

1. Never Forsaken (The Kurtherian Gambit #5) – Michael Anderle
Never Forsaken (The Kurtherian Gambit #5) - Michael Anderle
Thoughts: By Grapthar’s hammar, I will avenge cover art.

2. Finding Gina – Lizzie Chantree
Finding Gina - Lizzie Chantree
Thoughts: Gina, the gorgon.

3. Ignite the Flame (Satan’s Savages MC #2) – K E Osborn
Ignite the Flame - K E Osborn
Thoughts: I just.

5 responses to “Cover Snark (176): Right of First Snark”

  1. Tez Miller says:

    12. The Problem with Forever – That better have LGBTIQ+ content. A cover with rainbow colours, but NO LGBTIQ+ content, would be…disappointing.
    Tez Miller recently posted…4 New Covers (Heathfield, Larbalestier, McGinnis, Reisz)My Profile

  2. 1. omg I thought the same thing! This is a great cover.
    4. Yep, I was underwhelmed but even the arc seems to look prettier in person. So if it’s nice raised red foil on the hc, it’ll be nice.
    7. According to GR, this is a Sleeping Beauty tale in the 1800s? Could have fooled me.
    8. I find it really creepy.
    9. I find all of the series covers sort of busy but really appealing. Makes me want to read them.
    15. Reyyyyyyy!
    26. Omg this is adorable 😀
    27. Sparkles!! <3
    28. Looove the art style.
    39. I am 100% buying this book just for the cover bc LOOK AT THE BEAGLE. Andy does that to me with his paw tooooooo. But yeah, I need to make sure that dog is going to be okay first….

    Not a fan of the ACOMAF cover. Too much BOOBS in your face (like wow, armored boobs. It's distracting) and I hate the tattoo on her hand for REASONS.

  3. LG says:

    #8 – Is it just me, or does she look like one of the Olsen twins?

    #15 – Yay for Rey, but she looks like a perfectly made up wax model.
    LG recently posted…Jughead (comic book, #3) written by Chip Zdarsky, art by Erica HendersonMy Profile

  4. Hannah says:

    The boob armour for ACOMAF – it reminds me of those women in the pop-up ads for online fantasy games. Just the worst!
    Hannah recently posted…Review: This Savage Song (Monsters of Verity #1) – Victoria SchwabMy Profile

  5. Natasa says:

    For 24: The Forgetting, the background color is actually purple. Whoever uploaded it forgot to convert from CMYK to RGB. The actual purple cover is a lot more beautiful, so maybe you wanna change that? 😮

    For Cover battles @6: DEM BOOBS. But I’m still seriously excited for it :DD

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