Review: Not Otherwise Specified by Hannah Moskowitz

I received this book for free from Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.

Review: Not Otherwise Specified by Hannah MoskowitzNot Otherwise Specified by Hannah Moskowitz
Published by Simon Pulse on March 3, 2015
Genres: Contemporary
Pages: 304
Format: eARC
Source: Edelweiss
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five-stars

Etta is tired of dealing with all of the labels and categories that seem so important to everyone else in her small Nebraska hometown.

Everywhere she turns, someone feels she's too fringe for the fringe. Not gay enough for the Dykes, her ex-clique, thanks to a recent relationship with a boy; not tiny and white enough for ballet, her first passion; and not sick enough to look anorexic (partially thanks to recovery). Etta doesn’t fit anywhere— until she meets Bianca, the straight, white, Christian, and seriously sick girl in Etta’s therapy group. Both girls are auditioning for Brentwood, a prestigious New York theater academy that is so not Nebraska. Bianca seems like Etta’s salvation, but how can Etta be saved by a girl who needs saving herself? 

The latest powerful, original novel from Hannah Moskowitz is the story about living in and outside communities and stereotypes, and defining your own identity.

Not Otherwise Specified was my third Hannah Moskowitz novel, so I thought I knew what to expect. I liked the other two. Not Otherwise Specified, though, has this totally unfortunate cover compared to the others, and I don’t know. Basically, my body was not ready for the emotional impact this book had on me. Moskowitz blew my mind with this one, making me laugh and even cry.

The thing about this book is that I’m sort of surprised I loved it so much. I mean, it’s written in this stream of consciousness style, which, let me just tell you, is very much not my thing. I’ve had a lot of bad experiences with it, because it generally feels very artificial or like the author was on a lot of drugs. That’s not the case with Not Otherwise Specified. Pretty much immediately, I was caught up in that VOICE. Etta’s voice is vibrant and real and she felt one hundred percent real to me.

My heart ached for Etta throughout this book. She’s a black, bisexual former ballerina struggling with an eating disorder in Nebraska. She’s the very definition of not fitting in, but also fitting in too much. What Etta hates more than anything is that she’s not otherwise specified. She can identify herself as having an eating disorder and as being bisexual, but everyone still puts her in these boxes. She hates that she doesn’t qualify by the technical definitions as anorexic, which just makes her feel like more of a failure, even more out of control, the same reason she gave up ballet which she loves so much.

You’re not supposed to look at a girl’s body when she dances, not in that way. She’s supposed to be unobtrusive. She’s supposed to just be part of the music, and here I come in all attention-grabbing and ETTAETTAETTA and you can make that sound as awesome and special0snowflakey as you want but at the end of the day that’s not what people want ballerinas to be.

Etta sums herself up so well with this quote. She’s vibrant, full of life, and charismatic as hell. However, she tries so hard to fit in, like she did with the Dykes, her group of lesbian friends, who ejected her when she dated a guy, despite the fact she always said she was bi. She tried to be the ballerina that everyone wanted, but became so obsessed with control and how her body was wrong that she developed an eating disorder. Not Otherwise Specified is partially the story of Etta coming to terms with her Ettaness.

A big part of Not Otherwise Specified is about friendship. Friends, even when they love you, can be bad for you. Etta loved the Dykes, but they’ve turned on her and are bullying her. Even so, she kind of wants them back. It’s hard for her to let go, especially of Rachel. She makes a new group of friends through an audition for Brentwood Academy, a school for theater. They still all make mistakes with one another, but the difference between the friendship dynamics is stark.

Not Otherwise Specified gets dark. I mean, the issues are really heavy, but that’s counteracted by Etta’s voice, which is so full of life and humor. Etta doesn’t let things get her down for long; she’s really sweet and optimistic. She sticks up for people and cares so hard. Yes, it hurts, and I marked a lot of quotes for how much they saddened me but also struck this really honest chord. The ending, though, made me happy cry for the progress that’s being made.

I fucking loved this book. I think it’s beautiful and important. READ IT READ IT READ IT.

Favorite Quote:

“Hey. I’m the queer one here and I’m saying leave her alone. She’s fucking fourteen. She doesn’t hate anyone. She isn’t running around telling people they’re going to Hell. She’s struggling because her damn God told her something she’s questioning and that’s really scary for her and she’s fourteen. Leave her alone.”

Tl;dr – Review in a GIFfy:

 gif ambition to be happy pretty hurts beyonce

3 responses to “Review: Not Otherwise Specified by Hannah Moskowitz”

  1. Alessandra says:

    Am I the only one who sees “Hannah Moskowitz” and thinks of Lilli and Michael Moskowitz from the Princess Diaries series?

  2. Brigid says:

    I’ve come to learn from some friends that there are people in the gay community who are not that well accepting if you’re bi. I’m not totally shocked by this. I would like to think that everyone who knows what it’s like not be well accepted in society wouldn’t subject others to that same thing.

    YESSS. I want to read this so bad. Hell yes to that Beyonce gif. I love her.
    Brigid recently posted…Review: The Sin Eater’s Daughter by Melinda SalisburyMy Profile

  3. Rebecca says:

    Ooh, 5 stars! I haven’t read a Moskowitz book, but when I saw this for review, I knew I had to request. I’m going to take your READ IT READ IT READ IT advice and read it next. Thanks for the push and brilliant review!
    Rebecca recently posted…Dive Into Diversity: Love Has No LabelsMy Profile

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