Cover Snark (217): The Witch Who Came in from the Snark

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don’t write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I’ve linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

Please note that you should by no means contact the author if you do not like their cover; they likely have ZERO control. Feel free to express opinions of the covers in the comments, but please do not @ an author on Twitter because of anything you’ve seen here.

Shiny and New:

1. The Witch Who Came In from the Cold Season One – Lindsay Smith, Max Gladstone, Cassandra Rose Clarke, Ian Tregillia, & Michael Swanwick

Thoughts: The covers for this SerialBox series have been on point, and this is no exception.

2. Alex & Eliza: A Love Story – Melissa de la Cruz

Thoughts: Cashing in on Fads: A Life Story.

3. Seriously Hexed (Seriously Wicked #3) – Tina Connolly

Thoughts: That’s about the least comfy place you could brew a spell. And what’s with the concentric circles in the top left corner?

4. Wishbones – Virginia MacGregor

Thoughts: “Feather covers are overdone, but the heroine’s name is ACTUALLY Feather. Surely, we can get away with it?”

5. Seize Today (Forget Tomorrow #3) – Pintip Dunn

Thoughts: I think I’ll leave today for the bug zapper to seize.

6. Devil in Ohio – Daria Polatin

Thoughts: I give it a 6.66 out of 10.

7. Contagion – Teri Terry

Thoughts: Con Tag Ion is a nonsensical title.

8. Invisible Emmie – Terri Libenson

Thoughts: She must walk into stuff a lot.

9. Freefall – Joshua David Bellin

Thoughts: Is she a space DJ?

10. The Hollow Girl – Hillary Monahan

Thoughts: Tagline gets a hell yes, but lbr horror covers aren’t really up my general alley.

11. Truth or Dare – Non Pratt

Thoughts: Hate the color choices, the font choices, and that it’s yet another bland cover with hearts on it. *sighs*

12. A Line in the Dark – Malinda Lo

Thoughts: I’m not opposed to minimalism, but this is a wee bit much maybe?

13. There’s Someone Inside Your House – Stephanie Perkins

Thoughts: I REALLY hope this is a placeholder cover. It could be, but it’s up at like every bookseller site ever, and placeholders usually SAY they’re placeholders.

14. I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter – Erika L. Sanchez

Thoughts: Imperfect daughters have imperfect braids.

15. Welcome to the Slipstream – Natalka Burian

Thoughts: Well, that guitar’s fucked.

16. The Memory Trees – Kali Wallace

Thoughts: Without the memory of earth.

17. Even the Darkest Stars – Heather Fawcett

Thoughts: *squints* Does she have a fox companion? Or maybe a coyote?

18. The Beautiful Lost – Luanne Rice

Thoughts: Pretty white people pouting prettily.

19. The Hummingbird Heart (Haunted Hearts Legacy #2) – A.G. Howard

Thoughts: The left half is lovely and the right half is absurd. Also, the fonts are awful, and the best seller note is WAY too big.

20. A Red Peace (Starfire #1) – Spencer Ellsworth

Thoughts: Is anyone else tragically reminded of The Phantom Menace pod racing?

21. The Lamb Will Slaughter the Lion – Margaret Killjoy

Thoughts: Oh my god, she has the perfect last name for this. Beautiful, creepy artwork.

22. Vallista (Vlad Taltos #) – Steven Brust

Thoughts: Clearly inspired by the Marie Brennan covers but lbr this is my JAM.

23. Sovereign (Nemesis #2) – April Daniels

Thoughts: I don’t love the silhouette thing, especially in this pose. I do like the font treatments, though.

24. Ecdysis – Julianna Baggott

Thoughts: Is ecdysis the act of turning into a tree?

25. The Last Novelist (or, A Dead Lizard in the Yard) – Matthew Kressel

Thoughts: Why focus on the lizard when there’s a giant pufferfish RIGHT THERE?

26. Come See the Living Dryad – Theodora Goss

Thoughts: I don’t think she wants us to come see her.

27. Losing Heart Among the Tall – A. M. Dellamonica

Thoughts: Lovely artwork, though by no means the best of these.

28. The Scholast in the Low Waters Kingdom – Max Gladstone

Thoughts: I SHIP IT.

29. The Will to Battle (Terra Ignota #3) – Ada Palmer

Thoughts: What an oddly soothing cover about the will to fight.

30. A Tyranny of Queens (Manifold Words #2) – Foz Meadows

Thoughts: It’s the title font and little blue people who keep this from being a hit for me.

31. Beast & Crown – Joel Ross

Thoughts: Bald child angers me bc he reminds me of Aang, which reminds me of the tragedy that is Aangtara.

32. Little Wrecks – Meredith Miller

Thoughts: Hot.

33. Joplin, Wishing – Diane Stanley

Thoughts: They look like they’re about to run lovingly into each other’s arms.

34. 11 Before 12 – Lisa Greenwald

Thoughts: Looks a bit more YA than MG to me, but I love the cover models who are the ones making it look older so gah IDEK.

35. The Summer of Bad Ideas – Kiera Stewart

Thoughts: SO PRETTY.

36. The End of the Day – Claire North

Thoughts: Mr. Poppins?

37. Besieged: Stories from The Iron Druid Chronicles (The Iron Druid Chronicles #0.3, #4.7, #8.6) – Kevin Hearne

Thoughts: “Bro, check out my sword.” “WTF, man, I don’t want to see your sword.”

Cover Battles:

1. The Inevitable Collision of Birdie & Bash – Candace Ganger

US Take 1 vs. US Take 2: Now with more whiteness!

2. What to Say Next – Julie Buxbaum

US Take 1 vs. US Take 2: Very minor change, but a good one. The teal makes the cover pop.

3. The Other Side of Summer – Emily Gale

Australian vs. US: One hundred percent thought this was middle grade based on the US cover. Besides, I’m in love with the font treatment and color scheme of the Australian cover.

WTF of the Week:

WTF of the Week began as a special category for one cover I saw, but was so popular it became a recurring feature. Here, I highlight covers, both new and old, that I’ve found, which, upon viewing, made me either snort or say something along the lines of “Dear God, what is that thing?”

1. Reinventing Alexis – Jessica Sorensen

Thoughts: DIS BITCH. Also, seriously holy shit this color palette is awful and the filters gah.

2. Carnal Desire (The Onyx Club #3) – Sebastian Ex

Thoughts: When romance covers turn murdery. Such swoon.

3. Clean – Mia Kerick

Thoughts: Dear god, no. First, kill all of those fonts and never let them disgrace a cover ever again. Ditto to the fake liquid. Then maybe pluck this guy’s eyebrows a little or change the lighting, unless you’re going for a unibrow look.

2 responses to “Cover Snark (217): The Witch Who Came in from the Snark”

  1. Angie says:

    I’m gonna be laughing or that cashing in on fads comment all day because seriously, have truer words ever been spoken about that author?

  2. 2. TRUTH. I wish this was written by basically anyone else because I’m still drawn to it but I don’t care for her books o_O
    12. Yes. I wouldn’t give this a second glance.
    13. This better be. Super disappointing otherwise!
    15. I like the swirls!
    17. So pretty!! It looks like one of those cute fennel foxes with the giant ears haha.
    35. Cuuuuute. Love the colors.
    WTF3. Robert Pattinson meets Viktor Krum.
    Morgan @ The Bookish Beagle recently posted…Mini Review Monday: Shadows and SecretsMy Profile

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