Cover Snark (180): Snark Makes a Comeback

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don’t write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I’ve linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

Please note that you should by no means contact the author if you do not like their cover; they likely have ZERO control. Feel free to express opinions in the comments, but please do not @ an author on Twitter because of anything you’ve seen here. Let’s keep it kind.

Shiny and New:

1. Kingdom of Ash and Briars – Hannah West
Kingdom of Ash and Briars - Hannah West
Thoughts: ALWAYS HERE FOR CREEPY ILLUSTRATED FAIRY TALE FORESTS.

2. Empire of Dust (Blood of Gods and Royals #2) – Eleanor Herman
Empire of Dust (Blood of Gods and Royals #2) - Eleanor Herman
Thoughts: Obviously that’s not the key to my heart because I hate it.

3. The Fixes – Owen Matthews
The Fixes - Owen Matthews
Thoughts: I was never that good with white-out.

4. Darkstalker (Wings of Fire: Legends #1) – Tui T. Sutherland
Darkstalker (Wings of Fire Legends) - Tui T. Sutherland
Thoughts: Dragon looks skeptical about another series of Wings of Fire. But dragon does it very prettily.

5. This Adventure Ends – Emma Mills
This Adventure Ends - Emma Mills
Thoughts: The stars on a blue background make me think of the American flag, so I’m assuming this is about the fall of the United States.

6. Swarm (Zeroes #2) – Scott Westerfeld, Margo, Lanagan, & Deborah Biancotti
Swarm - Scott Westerfeld, Margo, Lanagan, & Deborah Biancotti
Thoughts: Don’t you love how they subtly darkened the area behind Scott Westerfeld’s name and not behind his cowriters so their names are hardly legible?

7. United (Alienated #3) – Melissa Landers
United (Alienated #3) - Melissa Landers
Thoughts: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

8. Gemina (The Illuminae Files #2) – Amie Kaufman, Jay Kristoff
Gemina (The Illuminae Files #2) - Amie Kaufman, Jay Kristoff
Thoughts: I believe that this book needs to be in my hands immediately.

9. Metaltown – Kristen Simmons
Metaltown - Kristen Simmons
Thoughts: They kicked this one into high gear, just in case you weren’t sure it was steampunk.

10. Bad Blood (The Naturals #4) – Jennifer Lynn Barnes
Bad Blood - Jennifer Lynn Barnes
Thoughts: NOW WE GOT PROBLEMS AND I DON’T THINK WE CAN SOLVE THEM

11. Transcendent – Katelyn Detweiler
Transcendent - Katelyn Detweiler
Thoughts: I’m noticing a continued biblical theme to Detweiler’s books. And this cover makes me twitch.

12. Water’s Wrath (Air Awakens #4) – Elise Kova
Water's Wrath (Air Awakens #4) - Elise Kova
Thoughts: My least favorite of the bunch, but still pretty art. It’s just that the fur of that person’s coat looks like their hair and it’s weird.

13. Rent a Bridesmaid – Jacqueline Wilson
Rent a Bridesmaid - Jacqueline Wilson
Thoughts: Not sure why middle graders need bridesmaids or what that has to do with horseshoes, but I do like that there seem to be gay couples on the cover.

14. The Shadow Cadets of Pennyroyal Academy (Pennyroyal Academy #2) – M. A. Larson
The Shadow Cadets of Pennyroyal Academy - M. A. Larson
Thoughts: Flee from the creepsters in the shadows!

15. Caught (Heart On #1) – Erika Ashby, A.E. Woodward
Caught - Erika Ashby, A.E. Woodward
Thoughts: Obviously she was caught playing paintball when expressly forbidden.

16. Still Life with Tornado – A.S. King
Still Life with Tornado - A.S. King
Thoughts: Those are some random words on those labels. Macedonia, Umbrella, and Seaweed, for example.

17. Painting Sky – Rita Branches
Painting Sky - Rita Branches
Thoughts: Another NA that’s not just putting a sexy couple on the cover. Really love the cloud effect actually.

18. It Ends with Us – Colleen Hoover
It Ends with Us - Colleen Hoover
Thoughts: Seriously what did flowers do to cover designers?

19. Things Too Huge to Fix by Saying Sorry – Susan Vaught
Things Too Huge to Fix by Saying Sorry - Susan Vaught
Thoughts: “Sorry I burnt the town down. Srsly my b.” doesn’t quite have the right ring to it, it’s true.

20. School Dazed (Been There, Done That #2) – Mike Winchell, ed.
Been There, Done That 2 School Dazed - Mike Winchell, ed.
Thoughts: If only yearbook pictures actually had this much personality.

21. Invincible (The Twixt #4) – Dawn Metcalf
Invincible (Twixt #4) - Dawn Metcalf
Thoughts: ANGRY BIRD.

22. Reliquary (Reliquary #1) – Sarah Fine
Reliquary - Sarah Fine
Thoughts: Will never understand why so many covers have women in this pose.

23. The Weather – Caighlan Smith
The Weather - Caighlan Smith
Thoughts: I don’t think I would wait for weather on a roof tbh.

24. Far from Over (Love, Lucy #2) – April Lindner
Far from Over (Love, Lucy) - April Lindner
Thoughts: If Epic Reads is putting a banner at the bottom of their ebook covers, I guess we should too.

25. Freedom Is Space for the Spirit – Glen Hirshberg
Freedom Is Space for the Spirit - Glen Hirshberg
Thoughts: HOWL’S MOVING BEAR CASTLE!

26. There Will Always Be a Max (Genrenauts) – Michael R. Underwood
There Will Always Be a Max (Genrenauts) - Michael R. Underwood
Thoughts: Max will always wonder why the rum is always gone.

27. Discards (Wild Cards) – David D. Levine
Discards (Wild Cards) - David D. Levine
Thoughts: HE IS GROOT.

28. That Game We Played During the War – Carrie Vaughn
That Game We Played During the War - Carrie Vaughn
Thoughts: I’m guessing the game involved either haircutting or making faces into wallpaper.

29. Listen – Karin Tidbeck
Listen - Karin Tidbeck
Thoughts: Trying to decide if this is less or more upsetting than spitting up eggs like the lady in Airplane.

30. Terminal – Lavie Tidhar
Terminal - Lavie Tidhar
Thoughts: Why is his face so red?

31. Meat + Drink – Daniel Polansky
Meat + Drink - Daniel Polansky
Thoughts: Run while they’re looking the other way, tasty human meat + drink.

32. Dune Time – Jack Nicholls
Dune Time - Jack Nicholls
Thoughts: Now I wish sand was turquoise because that’s so pretty.

33. Red as Blood and White as Bone – Theodora Goss
Red as Blood and White as Bone - Theodora Goss
Thoughts: HO.LY. SHIT. The only thing I hate about these covers is that they’re not on actual books I can buy.

34. The Destroyer – Tara Isabella Burton
The Destroyer - Tara Isabella Burton
Thoughts: Not loving the color scheme and I’m confused by the black dot, but this is really neat.

35. Did I Mention I Miss You? – Estelle Maskame
Did I Mention I Miss You - Estelle Maskame
Thoughts: Did not miss you at all. It was better without you.

36. Boy Robot (Untitled Trilogy #1) – Simon Curtis
Boy Robot - Simon Curtis
Thoughts: Darth Vader’s clearly been here.

37. A Guide to the Other Side (Beyond Baylor) – Robert Imfeld
A Guide to the Other Side (Beyond Baylor) - Robert Imfeld
Thoughts: The gates open for incense and candles, if held by a boy and girl facing away from each other. Be careful, if you face towards each other, you’re legally married in some cultures.

38. The Twelve Days of Dash & Lily (Dash & Lily #2) – Rachel Cohn, David Levithan
The Twelve Days of Dash & Lily - Rachel Cohn, David Levithan
Thoughts: More like Douche and Lily amirite.

39. Rani Patel in Full Effect – Sonia Patel
Rani Patel in Full Effect - Sonia Patel
Thoughts: Not my favorite art style by any means but I love her.

40. The Dead Boyfriend (Fear Street) – R. L. Stine
The Dead Boyfriend (Fear Street) - R. L. Stine
Thoughts: He ran into her knife. He ran into her knife TEN TIMES.

41. Queer: A Graphic History – Meg-John Barker, Julia Scheele
Queer A Graphic History - Meg-John Barker, Julia Scheele
Thoughts: OMG, fashion goals.

42. The Movie Version – Emma Wunsch
The Movie Version - Emma Wunsch
Thoughts: Seriously, lensflare is a sign that they were like “hmm this looks boring, so why don’t we shove some spots on it.” I’m still bored btw.

43. The Swan Riders (Prisoners of Peace #2) – Erin Bow
The Swan Riders (Prisoners of Peace #2) - Erin Bow
Thoughts: Looks like The Scorpion Rules is getting redesigned.

44. Scythe – Neal Shusterman
Scythe - Neal Shusterman
Thoughts: Red is the new dead in grim reaper fashion.

45. Trouble Makes a Comeback – Stephanie Tromly
Trouble Makes a Comeback - Stephanie Tromly
Thoughts: There’s something very Catch Me if You Can About this.

Cover Battles:

1. Disruption (Disruption #1) – Jessica Shirvington

Disruption (Disruption #1) - Jessica Shirvington aus
Disruption (Disruption #1) - Jessica Shirvington

Australian vs. US: Cover vu, when a cover is so similar to a million other covers you could swear you’d seen it before. Yet I still like the US one better.

2. This Savage Song (Monsters of Verity #1) – Victoria Schwab

This Savage Song - Victoria Schwab
This Savage Song (Monsters of Verity #1) - Victoria Schwab

US vs. UK: Oh man, they’re so stylistically different that I can’t choose. This is up to you guys.

3. The Assassin Game – Kirsty McKay

The Assassin Game – Kirsty McKay take 1
The Assassin Game – Kirsty McKay take 2

US Take 1 vs. US Take 2: On the one hand, the new cover really sells horror, but I would much rather have take 1 on my shelves because take 2 upsets me.

4. Pennyroyal Academy (Pennyroyal Academy #1) – M. A. Larson

Pennyroyal Academy - M. A. Larson hb
Pennyroyal Academy - M. A. Larson

US Hardback vs. US Paperback: Redesign game on point.

5. The Scorpion Rules (Prisoners of Peace #1) – Erin Bow

The Scorpion Rules - Erin Bow
The Scorpion Rules (Prisoners of Peace #1) - Erin Bow

US Hardback vs. US Paperback: CALLED IT. Also, it’s simultaneously better and way too upsetting for me to handle.

WTF of the Week:

WTF of the Week began as a special category for one cover I saw, but was so popular it became a recurring feature. Here, I highlight covers, both new and old, that I’ve found, which, upon viewing, made me either snort or say something along the lines of “Dear God, what is that thing?”

1. Raising Rufus – David Fulk
Raising Rufus - David Fulk
Thoughts: This is like a nightmare I had after watching Jurassic Park at age 6. My favorite little detail is how the girl’s hair is flying in such a way that it looks like she has a unicorn horn.

2. The Mingled Destinies of Crocodiles & Men – Eric Arvin
The Mingled Destinies of Crocodiles  Men - Eric Arvin
Thoughts: Does the mingled destiny have something to do with the giant brown sheet in the woods? Are his fists balled and his head back because he’s getting a mega-painful crocodile bj back there?

3. Bentwhistle the Dragon in A Chilling Revelation (Bentwhistle the Dragon #2) – Paul Cude
Bentwhistle the Dragon in A Chilling Revelation - Paul Cude
Thoughts: IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL.

2 responses to “Cover Snark (180): Snark Makes a Comeback”

  1. Creepy forests are the beeeeeeeeeeesssssssst!

    *looks at my hardcover of Pennyroyal Academy* *looks at redesign*… *conflicted*
    Anya @ On Starships and Dragonwings recently posted…Sci-fi and Fantasy Friday {ARCs and $5 Giftcards Weekly!}My Profile

  2. lissa says:

    I like the first cover and that’s about it. but I’ve found that oversea covers sometimes seems way better than U.S. covers which is kind of sad because you can’t purchase them.

    as always, such a fun read, thanks. have a lovely day.
    lissa recently posted…The lazy blogger’s guide to: AcronymsMy Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge