Top Ten Books I Will Likely Never Get Around to Reading

Top Ten Tuesday is hosted by The Broke and the Bookish

Top Ten Tuesday is hosted by The Broke and the Bookish

Whoooops, I’m way late getting this up, but it’ll be much later that I ever attempt any of these books. I mostly went through my Goodreads to-read list with an honest eye, but a couple are ones I’ve considered reading, but haven’t even gotten so far as to add on GR.

1. Little House in the Big Woods by Laura Ingalls Wilder

With these, I think I missed the period of my life where I’d really enjoy them. As an adult, I’m not sure if I could handle these novels, if they’re anywhere near as saccharine and sweet as the television show, which I was addicted to as a wee thing. Let me know if you think I’m wrong, but I’ve never really been that into books set on the prairie anyway, so I’d say odds are low on this.

2. Finger-Licking Fifteen by Janet Evanovich

I adored the Stephanie Plum series for a really long time. So much so that I can’t bring myself to take the next unread book in the series off of my to-read shelf. This series was so funny, but it had very much started to lose its charm. My ship, which started off powerfully strong, was now laughably pathetic, because, while I appreciate that Stephanie chose to have fun before settling down, the love triangle (and sometimes square) had already assumed ridiculous proportions. Maybe when the series ends, I’ll chug through for the ending, but maybe I’ll just read the spoilers and sigh.

3. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon

While I actually own Outlander, purchased on a whim at Goodwill, what I’ve heard about it makes me highly skeptical that I’ll actually enjoy it. Though I’ve not gotten rid of my copy, so there’s a chance, I’ve really got zero interest in it at the moment. The show, I will probably try at some point. That might convince me to give the books a go, but, unless that happens, my copy will probably be moving off of my shelves.

Little House in the Big Woods - Laura Ingalls Wilder
Finger-Lickin Fifteen - Janet Evanovich
Outlander - Diana Gabaldon

4. The Nanny Diaries by Emma McLaughlin & Nicola Kraus

Purchased way back when it first came out and was way hyped up, and I didn’t follow the book world at all, The Nanny Diaries has been sitting on my shelves since 2002. I actually remember begging my mom to buy it for me, and oops. I think I picked it up and read a few pages once, before abandoning it. Having seen the movie and not enjoyed it, despite the magic of ScarJo, I should probably just finally put this one out of its misery and sell it to the local used bookstore.

5. Isabel Allende

I own five Allende novels (The House of the Spirits, Daughter of Fortune, Inés of My Soul, Portrait in Sepia, City of the Beasts), and my odds of reading them are pretty low at this point. Well, I’ll probably try the middle grade one, but I’m really scared of her adult novels now. My friend, Jordan, read some in the original Spanish, and apparently there are a lot of pregnancy plots, which no. Plus, I’ve read two Allende novels that I didn’t like much (Zorro and Maya’s Notebook). Why do I have so many? Because I used to acquire books from Goodwill very indiscriminately.

6. V. by Thomas Pynchon

Acquired, like so many others on this list because I was super pretentious when I was younger and bought anything by authors whose names I associated with LITERARY things. This is how I bought a Pynchon novel. Now, knowing more things about Pynchon, I never ever want to read him, and, when I next reorganize my library, this is gtfoing.

The Nanny Diaries - Emma McLaughlin & Nicola Kraus
The House of the Spirits - Isabel Allende
V. - Thomas Pynchon

7. The Year of the Flood by Margaret Atwood

I’ve read and loved a couple of Atwood novels. However, I struggled through Oryx and Crake. I want to love it, and I do have mild aspirations to reread it on audio and try to find love for the series. I’m just not convinced I’ll ever actually do that.

8. Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke

Once again, I was a victim of being curious about anything that was popular. I picked this up at Goodwill when I found it. My mom later read it and said it was incredibly boring. Now, mom and I don’t have identical taste, thus why it’s still on my shelves, but her assessment combined with the length puts this waaaaay down my long to-read list.

9. The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells

I want to like H.G Wells because of his impact on fiction, aka being instrumental in science fiction. However, I’ve read The Time Machine, and I thought it was boring. I don’t think I’ll ever read anything else by Wells. The synopses and retellings will have to do.

The Year of the Flood - Margaret Atwood
Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell - Susanna Clarke
The War of the Worlds - H.G. Wells

10. The Bible

The surprise for most of you will be that I’m actually tempted to read the Bible at all. I’ve read a bit of it for theology courses, and, I’ll grant you, much of that was boring. Still, one of my distant desires has been to read the Bible, not for the traditional sort of enlightenment though. I always felt like I was missing out on a lot of literary references because I was so unfamiliar with the Bible. Being honest with myself, though, this will never happen.

gif always look on the bright side of life of brian

I could probably list fifty more of these, but I’m already late getting this posted, so this will have to do. Apparently I need to be really hard on myself and cut a bunch of shit out of my collection when I next organize my shelves. I MAY NEED YOUR HELP BEING A HARDASS.

12 responses to “Top Ten Books I Will Likely Never Get Around to Reading”

  1. Oh yikes, Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell is on my TBR Challenge list this year and every time I think about picking it up I get a little more apprehensive… when I originally tried to read it I was just so bored! Hoping that the action picks up as the book goes on….

    I feel the same way you do about Outlander. I’m curious because it has such a big fanbase but a lot of the reviews I’ve read make me think I won’t actually like it.

    As for the Bible, I read (well, “read” it) it ages ago, one of those kid-friendly versions with little study pages and stuff. I’m tempted to try to re-read it, the real full thing, as an adult whose religious views have changed drastically from the way I was raised. But you’re right… I don’t know if I’ll ever get around to it….
    looloolooweez recently posted…Book Review | Wonder at the Edge of the World by Nicole HelgetMy Profile

  2. I attempted a re-read of Little House recently (last couple of years) and I couldn’t enjoy it as much as I remembered. I don’t plan on continuing the re-read. Jonathan Strange is on my list too! I’d like to try it someday but it’s ginormous and they’re making that BBC show about it soon. I’ll probably just watch it. I feel the same about the Bible, simply for an understanding of biblical references. H.G. Wells… haven’t read anything of his. So many classics I haven’t read I feel that I’ll never get around to.
    Bonnie @ For the Love of Words recently posted…Top Ten Tuesday – Due to Size, Still UnreadMy Profile

  3. I use to buy books like this as well…it looked literary so I grabbed it, and they are still sitting there. Granted I used to read nothing but literary books in high school, so at the time I probably would have gotten around to them. I thought about putting the Bible on my list, but that would be a lie…I’ve read quite a bit of it word for word, but I like learning about religions even if I don’t really ever want to participate in them. I keep one on my shelf along with a copy of the Ramayana and Book of the Dead.
    Michelle @ In Libris Veritas recently posted…Top Ten Tuesday: Books I’ll Probably Never ReadMy Profile

  4. I doubt I will ever read Little House in the Big Woods either, or any of the series. And I understand about the Stephanie Plum books losing their charm. I think I read up to 17, and then stopped. I’ve had to desire whatsoever to pick up any more.
    Quinn @ Quinn’s Book Nook recently posted…Ten Books I Will Probably Never ReadMy Profile

  5. Layla says:

    I will say that I very much enjoyed reading the Little House books again as an adult – I think I reread the first three last year, and while I enjoyed them differently than I did as a child (when they were all about adventure and survival), I still liked them a bunch.

    I think I also have a ton of Isabel Allende novels from a time when I thought I should read her. Have also absolutely done the “well, this is literary, I should pick it up!” thing at used bookstores and … not read most of what I brought home.

    Great list. I suspect that if I did this, Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell would be on my list, too. I’ve never had the slightest desire to read that.
    Layla recently posted…Top Ten Tuesday (1): Ten Books I Will Probably Never ReadMy Profile

  6. Steena says:

    I’m curious to know if you’ve read Paradise Lost? The interesting thing about the Bible’s place in literary history is that short of the VBS stories (Creation, Moses, Jonah, Noah, Job, Jesus) most of what gets popularized in culture is actually from John Milton, not the “good book.”

    I started reading the Little House books with my kid, reading aloud to him. I have found that they aren’t as “sappy sweet” as I expected them to be but I also haven’t gotten very far (they’re still kids right now). They remind me a lot of a prairie version of Anne of Green Gables. A story but also just vignettes of common life at the time – preserving food for the winter, oh shit there’s a bear coming around the farm house, going to town for supplies, etc.

  7. Maraia says:

    I completely agree with you on #10 – both that I will probably never read it and that it would improve my understanding of biblical references. Also, it would really help me with crossword puzzles, haha. I hate how often the clues relate to the Bible. I don’t stand a chance!

    I read maybe a quarter of the House of the Spirits and was so disgusted with it that I had to put it down. If it’s encouragement you need, GET RID OF IT. 🙂

  8. Tina says:

    I completely agree with #10, I’ll probably never read I did attempt a couple times but other then that I’ll never get around to it. I haven’t heard of any of the other books on your list but they don’t look like anything I’d read.

    Tina, The Bookworm
    Tina recently posted…Top Ten Tuesday – Books I’ll Never ReadMy Profile

  9. Kim says:

    Hahahaha omg The Bible. I actually gave reading the Bible straight through a good go when I was a kid. I got to the Book of Esther before quitting. There is 0% chance I will ever be reading it now. Also, I had the Catholic NIV version of the Bible which doesn’t even have the beautiful, flowery prose of the King James version. It was extra dry Bible reading. No bueno.

    I got probably about 3/4 of the way through Outlander ten years ago and gave up. I tried reading it again a few years later and couldn’t get into it. I held onto the book for yeeeeeears, though. Convinced that one day I’d wake up and it would be for me. Never happened and I have since given it away! Too many long descriptive passages of nothing and too much unfortunate 18th century misogyny. No thank you.

    Jonathan Strange is the first book I ever bought for Kindle over 4 years ago and I still haven’t read it. I keep telling myself it’s going to happen one day, though. I wonder how the show will fare and if it’ll be any good.
    Kim recently posted…Top Ten Tuesday (1): Ten Books I Will Probably Never ReadMy Profile

  10. Alessandra says:

    Wow, you’ve never tried Isabel Allende? After Of Love and Shadows and House of Spirits she was my favourite author. Unfiortunately I didn’t like her other novels so much. But, please, do try at least Of Love and Shadows. There’s no pregnancy, as far as I can remember, even though there are two baby girls born at the same time who are exchanged and given to the wrong mother. House of Spirits has plenty of rape and violence, and pregancies as well (even though I’m not sure what you mean by pregnancy plot).

  11. Lyn Kaye says:

    The Bible….*smacks self in forehead* Why didn’t I think of that??! The Bible makes FSoG look like an elementary reader!
    Lyn Kaye recently posted…Book Review: Exquisite CorpseMy Profile

  12. Krys says:

    Mine is physically picking up and reading something by Paulo Coelho. I did an audiobook of The Witch of Portobello, but when I think of actually reading something by him he just seems bland or far-fetched for me haha
    Krys recently posted…WSJ – “Is your job creative enough to resist robot automationWa?”My Profile

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