Cover Snark (132): Snark Saves the World

CoverSnarkChristina2

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don’t write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I’ve linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

Shiny and New:

1. No Such Person – Caroline Cooney
No Such Person - Caroline Cooney
Thoughts: Was there such a person before they got drowned?

2. Show and Prove – Sofia Quintero
Show and Prove - Sofia Quintero
Thoughts: Apparently Show and Tell has gotten more intense since my day.

3. Stand Off (Winger #2) – Andrew Smith
Stand Off - Andrew Smith
Thoughts: Oh good, his nose isn’t bleeding anymore. I feel like the tagline should be “he’s back and douchier than ever!”

4. Drowning Is Inevitable – Shalanda Stanley
Drowning Is Inevitable - Shalanda Stanley
Thoughts: Drowning is inevitable? This is going to be a non-stop fluff-fest.

5. While You Were Gone (Duplexity #2) – Amy Nichols
While You Were Gone - Amy Nichols
Thoughts: Ahahahaha, the faces in the Os. These are their O faces. BAHAHAHA.

6. Another Day (Every Day #2) – David Levithan
Another Day - David Levithan
Thoughts: Am I looking at them from the perspective of a pill? Like what is happening?

7. Hello, I Love You – Katie M. Stout
Hello I Love You - Katie M. Stout
Thoughts: Hello, I Love You, Won’t you come out right now? Hello, I love you, Let me preorder your face. (I also did an interview with Katie if you want to know more!)

8. The Wizard Returns (Dorothy Must Die #0.3) – Danielle Paige
The Wizard Returns (Dorothy Must Die) - Danielle Paige
Thoughts: This shade of acid green makes me think that the wizard is returning from rehab where he was trying to recover from his drug addiction.

9. Everything, Everything – Nicola Yoon
Everything, Everything - Nicola Yoon
Thoughts: ARTSPLOSION!!!

10. Volition – Lily Paradis
Volition - Lily Paradis
Thoughts: Best. Tagline. Ever. Too bad the cover itself is boring.

11. You and Me and Him – Kris Dinnison
You and Me and Him - Kris Dinnison
Thoughts: I do not have the right words to express how much the fact that there are not “and”s on the cover upsets me.

12. Andreo’s Race – Pam Withers
Andreo's Race - Pam Withers
Thoughts: He’s about to fall on his ass when he hits that word.

13. Arrows – Melissa Gorzelanczyk

Thoughts: Was asked by author to remove what turned out to be a placeholder (thank the book gods).

14. The Truth Commission – Susan Juby
The Truth Commission - Susan Juby
Thoughts: So the TAGLINE is a novel with footnotes and illustrations? Also, why do girls not have eyes and boys not have mouths and no one has noses?

15. Eden West – Pete Hautman
Eden West - Pete Hautman
Thoughts: Cover swoon.

16. Bright Lights, Dark Nights – Stephen Emond
Bright Lights, Dark Nights - Stephen Emond
Thoughts: Diversity and superheroes? YES PLEASE. The cheesy heart being formed by their arms I could do without but whatevs.

17. Poppy in the Field (Poppy #2) – Mary Hooper
Poppy in the Field - Mary Hooper
Thoughts: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA She just poppied up in the middle of a warzone. I can just see her booming at them, “YOU KIDS BEHAVE OR I WILL BURY YOU IN FLOWERS.

18. The Evertree (Spirit Animals #7) – Marie Lu
The Evertree (Spirit Animals #7) - Marie Lu
Thoughts: Is this like Animorphs meets LOTR?

19. Hearts of Fire – L.H. Cosway
Hearts of Fire - L.H. Cosway
Thoughts: New adult is doing something different. Not sure if I’m ready for clown romance, but the cover’s pretty. (I did not read the blurb and it might NOT be about clown romance, but who knows which hearts are fiery.)

20. The Tragic Age – Metcalfe
The Tragic Age - Metcalfe
Thoughts: That seems to sum up being a young adult pretty well. I’d like it better without the skateboarding figure awkwardly photoshopped on, but not entirely tragic. (Also weird that it’s got the same background concept as Hearts of Fire and they ended up back to back.)

21. Splintered (Arcane Underworld #2) Jamie Schultz
Splintered (Arcane Underworld #2) Jamie Schultz
Thoughts: Urban fantasy covers really need to branch out. “Hello, here is a human posed dramatically with a weapon and some intense shit in the background” says every urban fantasy cover ever.

22. A Crown for Cold Silver – Alex Marshall
A Crown for Cold Silver - Alex Marshall
Thoughts: I still maintain the cover for the ARC is better.

23. Briar Queen (Night and Nothing #2) – Katherine Harbour
Briar Queen (Night and Nothing #2) - Katherine Harbour
Thoughts: A photoshopped person is walking through a forest. Like, try to make the lighting on the person and the trees match, for fiction’s sake.

24. Kitty Saves the World (Kitty Norville #14) – Carrie Vaughn
Kitty Saves the World (Kitty Norville #14) by Carrie Vaughn
Thoughts: Their band name is obviously Kitty and Her Wolfpack. Their first single: “Howl you like me now?,” but the cult hit off the album will obviously be “Kitty Pride.”

25. The Revelation of Louisa May – Michaela MacColl
The Revelation of Louisa May - Michaela MacColl
Thoughts: That white dress is not ideal for a jaunt through the forest.

26. Hold Tight, Don’t Let Go – Laura Rose Wagner
Hold Tight, Don't Let Go - Laura Rose Wagner
Thoughts: I do not haite it.

27. The Brilliant Light of Amber Sunrise – Matthew Crow
The Brilliant Light of Amber Sunrise - Matthew Crow
Thoughts: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22456939-the-brilliant-light-of-amber-sunrise?ac=1

28. Jesse’s Girl (Hundred Oaks #6) – Miranda Kenneally
Jesse's Girl (Hundred Oaks #6) - Miranda Kenneally
Thoughts: Too bad reverse image searching told me this is already on a YA contemporary romance cover.

29. Silver Eve (Guardians of Tarnec #1) – Sandra Waugh
Silver Eve (Guardians of Tarnec #1) - Sandra Waugh
Thoughts: Anybody else thinking of The Last Unicorn? I keep expecting a wave full of unicorns to roll in.

30. Apple and Rain – Sarah Crossan
Apple and Rain - Sarah Crossan
Thoughts: The apple who lived.

31. Mark of the Thief (Mark of the Thief #1) – Jennifer A. Nielsen
Mark of the Thief - Jennifer A. Nielsen
Thoughts: CAW, says the thief’s mark.

32. This Raging Light – Estelle Laure
This Raging Light - Estelle Laure
Thoughts: I would like this more if I hadn’t already seen that Sunrise one.

33. Material Girls – Elaine Dimopoulos
Material Girls - Elaine Dimopoulos
Thoughts: That tube top needs a bit more material over the girls.

34. Need – Joelle Charbonneau
Need - Joelle Charbonneau
Thoughts: This reminds me of the Fair Coin cover.

35. Hostage (The Change #2) – Rachel Manija Brown & Sherwood Smith
Hostage (The Change #2) - Rachel Manija Brown & Sherwood Smith
Thoughts: The girl has horns or cat ears or just bought a cat ear headband.

36. Of Shadow & Stone – Michelle Muto
Of Shadow & Stone - Michelle Muto
Thoughts: What a weird place to do yoga.

37. The Pact – Karina Halle
The Pact - Karina Halle
Thoughts: This poor city, attacked by giant lovemaking monsters.

38. Book Scavenger – Jennifer Chambliss Bertman
Book Scavenger - Jennifer Chambliss Bertman
Thoughts: Hmmm, I may be a book scavenger. BEST KIND TO BE.

Cover Battles:

1. Anastasia Krupnik (Anastasia #1) – Lois Lowry

Anastasia Krupnik (Anastasia #1) - Lois Lowry 1979
Anastasia Krupnik (Anastasia #1) - Lois Lowry 1981
Anastasia Krupnik (Anastasia #1) - Lois Lowry 1985
Anastasia Krupnik (Anastasia #1) - Lois Lowry 1993
Anastasia Krupnik (Anastasia #1) - Lois Lowry

1979 edition vs. 1981 vs. 1985 vs. 1993 vs. 2015: Looks like this book was very much due for a redesign. The others are very seriously dated. I’m not in love with the new cover, but it’s a very nice redesign all the same.

2. Anastasia Again! (Anastasia #2) – Lois Lowry

Anastasia Again (Anastasia #2) - Lois Lowry 1981
Anastasia Again (Anastasia #2) - Lois Lowry 1982
Anastasia Again (Anastasia #2) - Lois Lowry

1981 edition vs. 1982 vs. 2015: SOMEBODY’S BLUSHING. Does Anastasia get her first crush when she moves? Anyway, still maintain the new covers are muuuch better.

3. The Tightrope Walkers – David Almond

The Tightrope Walkers - David Almond UK
The Tightrope Walkers - David Almond

UK vs. US: Awwww, it’s so cute how the title is on the tight ropes. Hello, my name is Christina and I find strange things utterly precious.

4. Model Misfit (Geek Girl #2) – Holly Smale

Model Misfit (Geek Girl #2) - Holly Smale UK
Model Misfit (Geek Girl #2) - Holly Smale Dutch
Model Misfit (Geek Girl #2) - Holly Smale French
Model Misfit (Geek Girl #2) - Holly Smale

UK vs. Dutch vs. French vs. US: I’m a big fan of the US model-free covers. Otherwise, I’ve got to go for the French cover for the font treatment.

5. Tomorrow and Tomorrow – Thomas Sweterlitsch

Tomorrow and Tomorrow -Thomas Sweterlitsch Hardback
Tomorrow and Tomorrow -Thomas Sweterlitsch

US Hardcover vs. US Paperback: Can’t say which fits the book better, but I would be tempted to pick up the paperback and the flipped Tomorrow on the hardback makes me cringe.

6. Dead Spots – Rhiannon Frater

Dead Spots - Rhiannon Frater
Dead Spots - Rhiannon Frater

Take 1 vs. Take 2: The Take 1 was an early version that got scrapped and leaked anyway, I believe, but I still think it’s fun to compare. I really like the neutral color scheme and pop of the font on the final cover.

7. Seed Seeker (Seed #3) – Pamela Sargent

Seed Seeker - Pamela Sargent hardcover
Seed Seeker - Pamela Sargent audiobook
Seed Seeker - Pamela Sargent

US Hardback vs. Audiobook vs. US Paperback: Is the redesign an improvement? I mean, sort of? But also it looks like sci fi porn. Then again, they all do. I’m not generally a fan of retitling, but you just can’t call something SEED SEEKER, unless you want people to think it’s porn.

8. The Girls at the Kingfisher Club – Genevieve Valentine

The Girls at the Kingfisher Club - Genevieve Valentine
The Girls at the Kingfisher Club -Genevieve Valentine redesign

US Hardback vs. US Paperback: And THIS is how you redesign.

9. Kushiel’s Chosen (Phèdre’s Trilogy #2) – Jacqueline Carey

Kushiel's Chosen (Kushiel's Legacy 2) by Jacqueline Carey original
Kushiel's Chosen (Kushiel's Legacy 2) by Jacqueline Carey

US Original vs. US Redesign: Another nice redesign. Similar concept, but much better executed.

10. The Map of Chaos (Victorian Trilogy #3) – Félix J. Palma

The Map of Chaos - Félix J. Palma Spanish
The Map of Chaos - Félix J. Palma German
The Map of Chaos - Félix J. Palma

Spanish vs. German vs. US: Well, I actually really like both the Spanish and American covers, and it really comes down to whether it’s more fantasy-ish or more historical-ish.

WTF of the Week:

None this week, because there are a bunch of covers, but, if you missed last week’s Cover Snark, go check it out for your dose of WTF.

Choose Your Favorites:

8 responses to “Cover Snark (132): Snark Saves the World”

  1. 1. LOL
    3. I like Winger’s cover so much better! (Also, need to read Winger).
    4. Seriously what.
    6. Those do look like pills. Also, bad filter alert!
    7. I don’t like mushy covers but I like this cover.
    9. This cover is all kinds of adorable.
    10. THAT TAGLINE, THOUGH.
    11. Umm I need the ands on there, too!
    16. Cheesy heart, go away.
    38. Bookish adventures!
    CB3. Love the US cover so much!

    The cover of Everything, Everything wins this week!
    Sana // artsy musings of a bibliophile recently posted…Monthly Recap: DecemberMy Profile

  2. Dragana says:

    5. O faces. 😀 You are killing me. 😀

    8. It’s a sad day when the best cover so far is the novella cover (this one) and it’s slime green in color…

    10. Waiting for King Kong…

    13. The title is a line, there is only one arrow on the cover.

    15. Nice!

    27. I can not link to your thought on this one. Love the colors on the cover.

    36. Looks awesome though.
    Dragana recently posted…December 2014 – Monthly RewindMy Profile

  3. Brandy says:

    7. I’m so excited about this book.

    18. That is pretty much EXACTLY what Spirit Animals is. Except they don’t really morph. BUT STILL.

    19. I am most definitely not in any way ready for clown romance. But I do like this cover.

    28. Every time I see this I start singing the stupid song.

    38. Ooooh! MG I didn’t know about. Excellent.
    Brandy recently posted…Most Anticipated Books of 2015My Profile

  4. I love this feature so much. I look forward to it pretty much every week. Some of these covers are so great, but some are always so awful. Your comments are literally the best part. Also, I was super surprised about the Miranda Kenneally cover! Keep this feature going please!
    Max @ Maximum Reads recently posted…Personal Post: Happy New Year! + New Blog InfoMy Profile

  5. Maddy E says:

    4. That deadpan sarcasm just killed me! Though I have to admit, it does sound rather Fault In Our Stars “inevitability of human oblivion.”

    6. In all honesty, I’m not super excited about another one of these books. I wasn’t a huge fan of Every Day, and this cover looks like a weird combination of the first one and the TV tie-in for The 100.

    9. I think I’m dying of how beautiful this cover is. My entire life has been leading up to this day, where I get to experience this cover. Here is a perfect example of how a pretty cover can make me pick up a book no questions asked.
    Maddy E recently posted…Review: Mortal Heart by Robin LaFeversMy Profile

  6. Yay first cover snark of the new year!!

    7. You already know I love Hello I Love You’s cover 😀 Can’t wait to read it!!

    15. Eden West is striking! I almost don’t even care what it’s about.

    17. Hmmm a bit too PINK and bright for me. And that’s besides the floating head.

    19. I love the typography and design! (But I hate circuses)

    23. I’m drawn to covers like these actually, even if they do start to look similar.

    27. Looks like sherbet.

    31. I love this cover and I think the book sounds even better. I’m a sucker for the shiny medal on a fantasy book.

    Omg I forgot about Anastasia Krupnik until I saw these covers! PRetty sure I read it as a kid.

    I like the US Geek Girl covers best too. Not a fan of the different models.

    All in all, not in love with many covers this week. But I’m glad Cover Snark is back! Thanks as always for this excellent feature 🙂
    Morgan @ Gone with the Words recently posted…Morgan’s 2015 Reading Challenges!My Profile

  7. Meg says:

    1. I feel like this title is trying to trip me up. ‘What person? You’re imagining the person. Are you on drugs? Definitely no person here.’

    2. If tI had this kind of show and tell in school I’d probably have skipped class a lot less.

    3. Mental note, read these.

    4. It’s so pretty though. Hello pretty, sad-sounding book, won’t you be mine?

    5. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    (I’m giddy with the relief of not having to replace my bathroom plumbing, okay? Don’t judge me)

    6. At least they’ll coordinate?

    7. Earworm

    8. IIt’s very green?

    9. I wish my doodles came out like this ever.

    10. This is giving me height wigeons.

    11. It is colorful and fun though, so there’s that.

    12. Fun fact, I’ve used that stock silhouette before.

    13. Is this an actual letter I can add my name to? Because seriously.

    14. Everyone gets one feature, it;s only fair.

    15. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE

    16. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE

    17. Definitively don’t love.

    18. I am clearly missing the nostalgia factor that allows people to like these because all I can think is way to go nuts in photoshop.

    19 WAIT IS IT SERIOUSLY A CLOWN ROMANCE BECAUSE I WOULD READ THE FUCK OUT OF THAT WHAT? DON’T LOOK AT ME LIKE WHAT

    20. the skateboarder is so awkward like why? it’s a stylized illustrated cover, use a stylized illustration ffs

    21. Seriously, this could be any UF ever.

    22. I mean, how can you beat that quote?

    23. Something about the font is driving me mad and I can’t pinpoint exactly what. I think it’s because the edges are fuzzy? It’s making me twitch and I don’t like it.

    24. See #21 and repeat

    25. Is it just me or does it look like she’s floating a little bit? Photoshop fail.

    26. Hahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha

    27. s2g, didn’t they already use this cover but with blue and different words?

    28. The part where is coordinates with the others pleases me

    29. A WAVE FULL OF UNICORNS MY MENTAL PICTURE IS PURE GOLD

    30/. Now that you’ve said it, I can’t unsay it. I still like it, though.

    31. Okay.

    32. Iiiiiiiiisn’t this kind of the same as 27 but with different colors and words?

    33. I think I like this? A lot? Like a bizarre amount given how simple it is? Idk why

    34. This looks like a Liam Neeson movie poster

    35. That cave looks radioactive, I would not go in there.

    36. This is basically the Eli Monpress cover but with a girl and nighttime and therefore I love it.

    37. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

    38. I would play this game.

    CB 7. NO SERIOUSLY THAT HAS TO BE PORN
    Meg recently posted…Perpetual Page Turner End of the Year SurveyMy Profile

  8. 3. I hear good things about this series, but I hate the covers so much.
    4. I love what they did with the title.
    8. It’s still a shame I can’t read these books (bad behaving author)
    9. PRETTY.
    13. This looks like a self-published book.
    19. This cover would almost trick me into reading a NA book.

    Seed seeker.. what an unfortunate title.
    The girls at the kingfisher club, what a cute new design.
    Mel@thedailyprophecy recently posted…Yearly recap 2014.My Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge