Cover Snark (131): The One with Only WTF

CoverSnarkChristina2

Welcome to the special Christmas edition of Cover Snark! This week, there are no new covers. Yeah, I know. What even. However, to aid you in your holiday spirit, I’ve collected Christmas WTF covers for the past year and they are my gift to you. Ho-Ho-Holy fuck what is up with these covers?

1. The Christmas Cowboy – Shanna Hatfield
The Christmas Cowboy - Shanna Hatfield
Thoughts: The McCoys didn’t ask for this under their Christmas tree.

2. The Fifth Day of Christmas – Kaia Bennett
The Fifth Day of Christmas - Kaia Bennett
Thoughts: On the fifth day of Christmas my true lust gave to me, five golden handcuffffffssssss.

3. Caribou’s Gift (Kodiak Point #3.5) – Eve Langlais
Caribou's Gift - Eve Langlais
Thoughts: Dick in a box for a caribou. That’s a new one.

4. Holiday on Ice (Play by Play #8.5) – Jaci Burton
Holiday on Ice (Play by Play #8.5) - Jaci Burton
Thoughts: You know how ice will make you sweat. That’s how it works, isn’t it?

5. Grumble Monkey & the Department Store Elf – B.G. Thomas
Grumble Monkey & the Department Store Elf - B.G. Thomas
Thoughts: Looks like Dash from Dash & Lily’s finally realized he was not into Lily and is actually into this elf. I’d believe that over him being into Lily tbh.

6. The Hazards of Mistletoe (Hazards #4) – Alyssa Rose Ivy
The Hazards of Mistletoe - Alyssa Rose Ivy
Thoughts: I don’t think mistletoe is what’s hazardous here.

7. Gift Wrapped – Karla Doyle
Gift Wrapped - Karla Doyle
Thoughts: He practically gift wrapped that dick for you.

8. A Child’s Christmas – Kate James
A Child's Christmas - Kate James
Thoughts: You know what does not sound sexy? A child’s Christmas. I mean, yeah, this says heartwarming, but I’m assuming it’s still a romance. Get Tiny Tim McFreckles off the cover.

9. Hear Me – Viv Daniels
Hot sexy fit man leaning against tree
Thoughts: I can’t hear the silver bells over the sounds of his victims’ cries.

10. Always on Christmas – Jackie Marilla
Always on Christmas - Jackie Marilla
Thoughts: Those are some big balls.

11. How Santa Lost His Jollies – Deborah J. Reis
How Santa Lost His Jollies - Deborah J. Reis
Thoughts: I always wondered what the child of Santa and Jabba the Hutt would look like.

12. Tangled (The Moreno Brothers #5.5) – Elizabeth Reyes
Tangled - Elizabeth Reyes
Thoughts: Merry Christmas, y’all.

9 responses to “Cover Snark (131): The One with Only WTF”

  1. Bekka says:

    This is my favorite edition of Cover Snark in the history of Cover Snarks.

    Merry Christmas!
    Bekka recently posted…The Magic of Rereading/Rewatching Harry Potter Part 1My Profile

  2. Brandy says:

    Thanks for the Christmas laugh. #2 & #3 are my favorites. As in made me laugh hardest. Agree with your assessment of #5. 🙂
    Brandy recently posted…TTT: Books for ChristmasMy Profile

  3. Ciara says:

    This is awesome, you are awesome! My favorite is number 3 hahaha. Merry Christmas!

  4. On #10, so … is Hank a pedophile and Emma his little victim sitting on his shoulders?

  5. Dahlia Adler says:

    This is hilariously fantastic. Also, I am totally into that Guy Who Could Be Dash. ALSO, fun fact: Karla Doyle is one of my favorite erotica authors ever. When I worked at Ellora’s Cave, I used to stalk her editor to make sure I got put on as the copy editor for her books. She has one that is centered around SCRABBLE. That is true hotness.

    And now I’ll be laughing at Ho-ho-holy fuck for the rest of the day.
    Dahlia Adler recently posted…5th Annual End of Year Book Survey – 2014 Edition!My Profile

  6. Maraia says:

    These are hilarious! And disturbing, in some cases. I’m new to your blog, but I’ve been enjoying your cover snark, this one especially.

  7. hahaha Tiny Tim McFreckles. Hilarious. And wrong. So wrong.
    Bonnie @ For the Love of Words recently posted…Book Review – The Perfect Present by Karen SwanMy Profile

  8. Sarah J. says:

    These covers all make me uncomfortable on some level. Just some are more cringe worthy than others.
    Sarah J. recently posted…Trilogy Wrap Up: Divergent EditionMy Profile

  9. Lyn Kaye says:

    This is all so fucked up….OMG still laughing at Dick in a box….
    Lyn Kaye recently posted…Nest n’ News: December Wrap-UpMy Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge