Cover Snark (77): The One with an Angry Little Man in a Bathtub

CoverSnarkChristina2

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don’t write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I’ve linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

Shiny and New:

1. Percy Jackson’s Greek Gods – Rick Riordan
Percy Jackson's Greek Gods - Rick Riordan
Thoughts: A whole bunch of gods, but it’s Percy giving off a halo of light. Okay, then.

2. The Cheesecake Queen – Miranda P. Koerner
The Cheesecake Queen - Miranda P. Koerner
Thoughts: Yum, cheesecake. Though peppermint would not be my flavor of choice. Still, that’s a queen I would worship.

3. The Rise of Mallory (Everville #3) – Roy Huff
The Rise of Mallory (Everville) - Roy Huff
Thoughts: Teenage Luke Wilson has had waaaaay too many drugs. Either that or he managed to invent that soda from Willy Wonka’s factory.

4. Abby Spencer Goes to Bollywood – Varsha Bajaj
Abby Spencer Goes to Bollywood - Varsha Bajaj
Thoughts: The cover’s not especially compelling, but you had me at Bollywood.

5. The Collection (The Registry #2) – Shannon Stoker
The Collection (The Registry #2) - Shannon Stoker
Thoughts: Considering that freedom changes EVERYTHING, this cover’s not all that different from the first. Still, I do like the teal and orange color scheme they’re rocking with the font and background.

6. The Bridge from Me to You – Lisa Schroeder
The Bridge from Me to You - Lisa Schroeder
Thoughts: Well, that looked better in the small version. In high res, they look so poorly photoshopped into this background. Meh.

7. The Rich and the Dead – Liv Spector
The Rich and the Dead - Liv Spector
Thoughts: Pretty. I love the hat and the tiling on the floor and the way the pool water turns red like blood’s slowly suffusing the waters.

8. Captivate – Vanessa Garden
Captivate - Vanessa Garden
Thoughts: Because lounging on lawn furniture works so well under the water.

9. Summer State of Mind – Jen Calonita
Summer State of Mind - Jen Calonita
Thoughts: This is being published by Hachette, but the main character’s name is Harper. Curiouser and curiouser. Oh right, the cover. Umm, I don’t think I would want to be in a pink inner tube that far out from everyone. I might look too much like a tasty seal.

10. The Blonde – Anna Godbersen
The Blonde - Anna Godbersen
Thoughts: I see what you did there, cover designer. The O is a bullet. CLEVER. Anyway, they did successfully convey Marilyn Monroe to me, so that’s cool, and I’m definitely curious why Marilyn wants to shoot me, so I guess it’s a win.

11. Confused (Getting Inside of V #2) – Kate Lynne
Confused (Getting Inside of V) - Kate Lynne
Thoughts: The sex must not be that good if he’s still unsure how to get inside V’s V in book two. Then again, she’s smoking, which pop culture implies means good sex, so which is it? I’m definitely confused alright.

12. Battle Angel (Immortal City #3) – Scott Speer
Battle Angel (Immortal City #3) - Scott Speer
Thoughts: Somehow this isn’t as intimidating or badass sounding as I’m sure it’s meant to be.

13. Unforgettable Summer: So Inn Love / Better Latte Than Never – Catherine Clark
Unforgettable Summer - Catherine Clark
Thoughts: What a beach. Shoe, puns! Shoe!

14. How to Meet Boys – Catherine Clark
How to Meet Boys - Catherine Clark
Thoughts: Oh, the secret to meeting boys is standing barefoot on your porch. They’ll come to you. No wonder I’m single. It’s my abhorrence of the outdoors. Well, now I know. *goes to stand on porch* *shivers*

15. 17 First Kisses – Rachael Allen
17 First Kisses - Rachael Allen
Thoughts: Is she first-kissing seventeen angels? Is that what’s happening here?

16. Then Came You – Jill Shalvis
Then Came You - Jill Shalvis
Thoughts: She better not kick that puppy in her swinging. This makes me nervous. Also, the title position makes it look like then you came out of his butt.

17. Clean Sweep – Ilona Andrews
Clean Sweep - Ilona Andrews
Thoughts: For the one time low price of five installments of $59.95, you too can own the Clean Sweep, a combination walking stick, broom, and hair curler.

18. Waiting for Romeo (Romeo #2) – Diane Mannino
Waiting for Romeo - Diane Mannino
Thoughts: Gonna be a long wait since he’s dead.

19. Embers & Ash (Cold Fury #3) – T.M. Goeglein
Embers & Ash - T.M. Goeglein
Thoughts: You don’t want to eat your fury cold? Awww, come on. Look, it’s a train. Choo choo! Here comes the train!

20. Savage Drift (Monument 14 #3) – Emmy Laybourne
Savage Drift (Monument 14 #3) - Emmy Laybourne
Thoughts: Savage Drift always dreamed of a life outside of the leper colony. It’s sad that, as a funny joke, I decided to pretend Savage Drift as a name, and that, in YA, it’s not really that out of place.

21. Sex Snob – Elizabeth Hayley
Sex Snob - Elizabeth Hayley
Thoughts: What exactly does being a sex snob entail? A wine snob only likes good wine, so do they only like good sex? I don’t see anything wrong with that. I do find it weird that she looks naked up top, but is wearing some weird sort of pink belly cut out something or other.

22. Removed at publisher’s request as the cover was leaked.

23. A Stranger in the Garden (The Unnaturalists #1.5) – Tiffany Trent
A Stranger in the Garden (The Unnaturalists #1.5) Tiffany Trent
Thoughts: *shrugs*

24. Latitude Zero – Diana Renn
LatitudeZero_JK_1P.indd
Thoughts: Diversity! And…a camera? This is the cover of the week that confuses Christina.

25. Blind – Rachel DeWoskin
Blind - Rachel DeWoskin
Thoughts: I like the simplicity of it, and the use of the braille. Also, I’m assuming the braille part will be raised on the print copies.

26. Endless (Shadowlands #3) – Kate Brian
Endless - Kate Brian
Thoughts: End less; start more.

27. Random – Tom Leveen
Random - Tom Leveen
Thoughts: Delightfully macabre.

28. R Is for Rebel (Unruly Royals #4) – Megan Mulry
R Is for Rebel - Megan Mulry
Thoughts: Good job, cover! You know so may words that start with R. One critique, though, “Running from love” is not a word. It’s three, two of which do not begin with R. *pats cover on the head*

29. Stiltskin – Andrew Buckley
Stiltskin - Andrew Buckley
Thoughts: Stiltskin love Ducky. Ducky love Stiltskin? No, really, what’s he doing in the bathtub?

30. The Wall (The Woodlands #2) – Lauren Nicolle Taylor
The Wall - Lauren Nicolle Taylor
Thoughts: Generally when people talk about having a wall up, they don’t mean it quite so literally.

31. Illusive – Emily Lloyd-Jones
Illusive - Emily Lloyd-Jones
Thoughts: Maybe if she’s trying to be all sneaky hidey, she should get away from the GIANT LETTERS BLOCKING THE ROAD. That would be like trying to sneak out of town on a t-rex. You stand out, girl.

32. Released (The Nogiku Series #2) – S.J. Pajonas
Released - S.J. Pajonas
Thoughts: Colorful paper cranes! The font treatments are boring, but I do like the riot of color and Asian-ness.

33. The Line (Witching Savannah #1) – J.D. Horn
The Line by J.D. Horn
Thoughts: Very reminiscent of A Discovery of Witches, but I still like it quite a bit.

34. Unsoul’d – Barry Lyga
Unsoul'd – Barry Lyga
Thoughts: Is that a halo on fire? Jupiter (The pwanet Wupiteh)? An eyeball? Also, it sort of looks like it says “a dirty little table.”

35. Princess Labelmaker to the Rescue (Origami Yoda #5) – Tom Angleberger
Princess Labelmaker to the Rescue - Tom Angleberger
Thoughts: She looks like she belongs on South Park.

36. License to Spill (The Pretenders #2) – Lisi Harrison
License to Spill (The Pretenders #2) - Lisi Harrison
Thoughts: 100% of these kids keeps a journal. Am I the only one who didn’t?

37. Banished (The Blackhart Legacy #1) – Liz de Jager
Banished - Liz de Jager
Thoughts: It’s like the Shatter Me covers have a full head now. Tree lashes all up everywhere!

38. The Immortal Crown (Age of X #2) – Richelle Mead
The Immortal Crown (Age of X #2) - Richelle Mead
Thoughts: She has a shiny halo. This is too Christian for me. *backs away* This also really doesn’t match the first cover, so redesign?

39. Kissing Midnight – Laura Bradley Rede
Kissing Midnight - Laura Bradley Rede
Thoughts: Paranormal cover cliches: 1) Pretty dress 2) Birds 3) Cloudy 4) Recognizable urban setting 5) Hair blowing in the wind 6) Mask 7) Floating face

40. Visions (Cainsville #2) – Kelley Armstrong
Visions by Kelley Armstrong
Thoughts: More fantasy birds! See, it’s a thing.

Cover Battles:

1. The Bone Season (The Bone Season #1) – Samantha Shannon

The Bone Season - Samantha Shannon hb
The Bone Season - Samantha Shannon

Hardback vs. Paperback: Well, that’s a huge change. NOT. I prefer the hardback, as it’s a slightly darker blue, but for reals yawn.

2. Hysteria – Megan Miranda

Hysteria
Hysteria - Megan Miranda

Hardback vs. Paperback: The redesign does fit the mystery vibe better, but I LOVE the mindfuckiness of the hardback.

3. The Pretenders (The Pretenders #1) – Lisi Harrison

The Pretenders
The Pretenders (The Pretenders #1) - Lisi Harrison

Take 1 vs. Take 2: Wow, they can’t even be bothered to put a different tagline on these new designs? Because if there’s anything that makes a tagline better, it’s repetition. I think I like the original better anyway, but the tagline seals the deal.

4. After Eden (After Eden #1) – Helen Douglas

After Eden
Lichtjahre zu dir
After Eden - Helen Douglas

US vs. German vs. UK: Oooh, the Germans win this round; the title translates to “Lightyears to You” which is cool too. And the US loses. HARD. I’m still awed at how terrible the cover is, with those noxious green farts. Just no. The UK cover is…meh. Better than the US one anyway.

WTF of the Week:

WTF of the Week began as a special category for one cover I saw, but was so popular it became a recurring feature. Here, I highlight covers, both new and old, that I’ve found, which, upon viewing, made me either snort or say something along the lines of “Dear God, what is that thing?” If you would like to be part of the fun and have spotted a truly hilarious or horrifying cover, submit it and your snark to cynicalsapphire@gmail.com and you might be included, though I will filter through submissions and limit the number of entries per week.

1. Crash Into You (Pushing the Limits #3) – Katie McGarry
Crash Into You (Pushing the Limits #3) - Katie McGarry
Thoughts: BAHAHAHA, their faces. Nope, nope, nope. Is the difference in this romance their derpy faces? And is that the model that’s always on covers with him but in a terrible blonde wig? IS IT? That’s them, right? Or maybe their evil, less attractive doppelgangers? WHO THOUGHT THIS LOOKED GOOD? WHO?

2. Summer of the Vanities (The Innocents #3) – Lili Peloquin
Summer of the Vanities - Lili Peloquin
Thoughts: Hahahahaha, Penguin, for real, are you even trying with this series anymore? I wonder if these are done by the same people who do the Bloodlines covers…

3. The Time Zombies Became the Least of My Worries (Boring Life #2) – Jen Naumann
The Time Zombies Became the Least of My Worries (Boring Life #2) - Jen Naumann
Thoughts: CORNNNNNNNNNN!

Outstanding Cover of the Week:

The Line by J.D. Horn

The Outstanding Cover of the Week is chosen by a Cover Snark reader. They are free to pick any of the week’s covers, whether they’re to my personal tastes or not. If you’d like to choose the cover for a week, either email or tweet me. You will need to be available Wednesday evening to consult.

The Line by J.D. Horn

Today, Welcome Debby (Snuggly Oranges), who has selected The Line by J.D. Horn. Here’s why:

“My pick for cover of the week has to be The Line by J.D. Horn. When I saw this I first just glanced across it, then I looked closer and… all those little details! The lines! I love the style of art: it’s definitely different and attention grabbing. It’s made me extremely curious about the story. And it’s a massive improvement over the cover they had before.”

To learn more or purchase: Goodreads|Amazon|TBD|B&N

32 responses to “Cover Snark (77): The One with an Angry Little Man in a Bathtub”

  1. Angie says:

    Cheest cover aside, I’m so excited for that Percy Jackson book.

    That cheesecake looks utterly delicious.

    How did I even miss the cover reveal of Between the Spark and the Burn…although I do not love this as much as the first cover, at all. It’s still pretty though. Just not as good.

    I like the Immortal Crown cover but I’m a sucker for anything that looks shiny. Although it does bug me that it doesn’t match the first. Cover redesigns are so annoying.

    Oooooooh the second Cainsville has a cover and title? I would never know these things if it wasn’t for you. I don’t pay enough attention.
    Angie recently posted…Waiting on Wednesday: Infinite by Jodi MeadowsMy Profile

    • Christina Franke says:

      Both Cainsville and Between the Spark and the Burn haven’t had official reveals as far as I know. I suspect the Tucholke cover was leaked, possibly Armstrong’s as well. Lots of covers just pop up on GR/Amazon, so I try to grab them, because, if they’re not getting an official reveal, they need the exposure more than ever.

      I didn’t like the first cover for Gameboard of the Gods, but I’m just so sick of them redesigning the good/decent covers, and leaving the really shitty ones.

      • Angie says:

        Yea I mentioned to April I thought the cover was pretty and she told me it had been leaked but I totally understand giving them exposure. Not all covers get an official reveal.

        I didn’t mind the first Gameboards cover, but I’m sick of them redesigning covers too. I’m still bitter about The Diviners.
        Angie recently posted…Waiting on Wednesday: Infinite by Jodi MeadowsMy Profile

        • Christina Franke says:

          Sometimes I suspect it was a leak, like in this case, but I really have no way of knowing for sure unless I start asking around, which “ain’t nobody got time for that.” Harper’s asked me to take a couple of them down, and I do. But generally I figure, the more exposure the better.

          Maybe it’s not a redesign and they just don’t match?

  2. Judith says:

    1. *snorts* Well, he is gonna tell the readers all the myths in this book. He holds the power here!

    2. I actually don’t like cheesecake, but this looks good. I don’t like that they blurred the title background. That’s just weird.

    3. Wingaaaardium levi-oh-sa.

    6. What bridge? Misleading title is misleading.

    8. Not sure if they’re gonna kiss or if this is just their creepy way of looking at each other.

    11. Looooool.

    12. Agreed. I think it’s the sun shining out of his elbow. And everything else.

    14. But but… I don’t have a porch. I will be forever alone.

    15. So, correct me if I’m wrong, but… don’t you need ANOTHER person if you want 17 kisses? Or technically 17 people, since they’re supposed to be 17 first kisses.

    16. Then Came You: the heartbreaking story of how love ruins your puppy’s life. This is not okay.

    19. “A heart-pounding mafia action-adventure” hahaha. Well, at least we know what genre this is.

    22. Blah. The first was so much prettier.

    27. Random is the right word.

    31. The tagline made me laugh out loud and I don’t even know why.

    32. So two weeks ago my mom was trying to make these but she couldn’t do it and I had to help her and it turned out it was pretty easy and then we had a house covered in paper cranes. True story. It looked a lot like this cover. (Random story.)

    33. Will illustrated covers ever stop being pretty? I think not.

    36. I never kept a journal either. I didn’t care for it at all.

    38. Where Rainbow Rowell gets the best covers ever, Richelle Mead gets the worst.

    CB 2. The first one is so cool! Why even change it?

    WTF 1. Two questions: Is this the UK cover? And whyyyyyyyyyyy?
    Judith recently posted…Top Ten Character NamesMy Profile

    • Christina Franke says:

      1. Guess who sent this cover to me. 😉

      2. Probably to make the words easier to read, but, now that I’ve noticed it, It is quite vexing.

      3. Someone’s clearly got that down. Or up, as the case may be.

      6. THE BRIDGE OF THEIR LOVE. REPRESENTED BY THEIR CLASPED HANDS.

      8. Fish kisses.

      11. Why do designers always put lens flare out of a body part? It’s weirddddd.

      14. HA HA. Finally, I am better at boy catching than someone else. Though I really just have a stoop. I hope that’s good enough.

      17. When you’re really in love, every kiss is a first kiss. Or some other sentimental tripe. Maybe she’s kissed seventeen imaginary boyfriends?

      18. Mommy never comes home anymore.

      19. The well-known genre of “mafia action-adventure”

      22. I know. But at least it will be easier for me to resist this one?

      31. Is it because she’s right there?

      32. That is awesome! I would be terrible at it too.

      33. Nooooope. I hope not.

      36. The few times I tried, I just wrote these diatribes because my parents were the worst or I got picked on at school. Life was depressing, but the journal was a million times worse.

      38. Seriously, Richelle Mead is hated by cover designers everywhere. What did she do?

      CB2. It appeals to the mystery audience more, I think. The person walking through a forest is stock mystery/thriller cover.

      1. Yes, that’s the UK cover. Thank goodness.

  3. Anya says:

    It amuses me that The Immortal Crown cover is too Christian for you since the books heavily pull in Norse mythology 😉 Also I’m conflicted about a redesign of book 1, I like it since it was so sci-fiy 😀

    Gah, the After Eden covers! You didn’t even pull in the other neon version, I think that it was another UK version but I’d have to check. Why must there be neon??

    Summer of the Vanities: Wow… that’s Penguin???
    Anya recently posted…The Truth About NetGalley’s Feedback RatioMy Profile

  4. Meg says:

    2. I want to eat that so bad.

    6. PEOPLE! RESOLUTION IS A THING THAT MATTERS. When will they learn?

    7. For a second, I thought this was a red rubber ball with arms and legs. It was a confusing moment.

    9. The Secrets of My Hollywood Life font is my favorite (for real, it’s called Filosofia Unicase and I actually nought it because SUE ME I’M A TYPE NERD)

    11. ROFL “get inside V’s V”

    21. How would one even go about being a sex snob? Would you require your partners to submit references ahead of time to ensure they meet your performance standards? That would be a fun phone call.

    22. #1 was much better imo.

    29. He lives in the drain, lying in wait to creep out and punish you if you don’t adequately scrub behind your ears.

    31. WANT!

    33. Oooooooh! Me likey!

    34. I think it’s a coffee cup ring on fire but that makes no sense at all.

    WTF #1. That is totally the Lux model minus the photoshopped eye treatment and plus a shave sometime in the last month (still no shower though)

    Great call Debby, that would’ve been my pick as well! I love the intricately detailed etching style.
    Meg recently posted…Q&A with Michael Adams, author of The Last GirlMy Profile

    • Christina Franke says:

      2. The food porn cover seems to have been a winner for everyone.

      6. Is that what’s wrong here? All I know is that it’s wrong.

      7. PACMAN IS RED AND HAS LEGS NOW>

      9. Awww, that’s so cute. It’s pretty fun, though I don’t like the random mix of capital and lower case letters.

      11. I am glad you appreciate my mature humor.

      21. Oooh, that’s a possibility, but I still fail to see how it’s a bad thing. You’re risking pregnancy at the very least, so why not be sure you’ll have a good time?

      34. That also seems possible. O_o

      WTF1. I really do not find those two attractive at the best of times. This is not the best of times. At all.

  5. 1. Not the best, but I do like the drawing style.
    5. I don’t like face covers most of the times and this is one of them. Blegh.
    7. Awh, like I wasn’t sad enough about the horrible weather already. I want summer so badly and this pool.. I want to jump in it.
    8. It’s a strange cover, but I still like it.
    10. Feels like a very old mystery book. I don’t think I like it.
    12. Looks very unprofessional..
    18. This is a face cover I do like.
    22. It’s hard to come up with something that’s better than the first cover, but I think I will get used to it.
    24. Weird..
    29. Hahaha, awesome.
    33. Pretty, I like the details.
    34. He, your cover edition is different from the one on Goodreads. That is a coffee mark and on GR, the title is on fire.
    37. I like the face, but not the color from the title.

    WTF 1. I hate the covers from the whole series, but this is even worse.
    Mel@thedailyprophecy recently posted…Review 208. Paula Guran – OUAT: New fairy tales.My Profile

    • Christina Franke says:

      5. I basically am indifferent. I think it’s funny how mad she looks.

      7. Even with all the blood? lol

      8. It’s got a lot of appeal for its market, so that’s good.

      10. I definitely like the old school style they’re rocking here.

      12. It’s just not good.

      18. Probably because of the freckles. They make her look so much more interesting than the interchangable poreless models.

      34. Huh. *scratches head*

      37. I enjoy the title font, but the yellow is a bit brash.

  6. Kayla Beck says:

    16. That couple does not impress the puppy at all. S/He needs to come live with me.

    18. I like her freckles.

    22. Look! The cover is almost as terrible as the first book!

    29. What would you do if you found an evil dwarf in your bathtub? (from Goodreads) – Umm, drown it? Or stop looking in the mirror.

    31. If I ever ride off into the sunset, it’ll be on the back of a T-Rex.

    33. Is that a penis on the top of the fountain?

    38. I never thought I’d say this as the owner of the original hardcover, but I HOPE there is a redesign. I like this cover a lot.

    WTF1. BAHAHAHAHAHA!
    Kayla Beck recently posted…Waiting on Wednesday (30): In the Age of Blood and ChocolateMy Profile

  7. MJ says:

    2) Cheesecake….yum.

    3) When someone finds out they’re not from Smallville….

    4) Agree the Bollywood part of the title is what makes it look interesting.

    8) Somehow I think this was visualized as looking cooler than it actually ended up being.

    9) I keep thinking of those old Hostess commercials where a shark would be attacking someone because their inner-tube resembled a pastry. This one doesn’t look like a Hostess, but sort of like a donut.

    15) The way she’s smelling makes it look like an Herbal Essence commercial.

    16) I’m concerned about the puppy too.

    17) X-Men reject

    18) It’s about a fangirl who didn’t actually read the play or they would’ve realized that Romeo isn’t worth dating over.

    21) Let me guess, she doesn’t like dinos.

    30) Matt Bomer’s less attractive brother.

    38) I think this was supposed to be the new cover for Halo

    39) It just looks two disjointed like they tried to fit all the necessary elements to a PNR cover on a page and it just sort of flopped.

    WTF
    1) Yep, pretty sure it’s them. And the blonde looks terrible on her. They’re actually engaged/dating in real life, maybe that’s why they’re always paired together. I think they just need to get the two of them a CW show and leave it at that.
    MJ recently posted…Tuning In: Witches of East End (1.3 Crappy Cardigans)My Profile

  8. Gillian says:

    1. I actually really dislike the drawings of each god. They look pretty derpy.

    2. Give. It.

    3. But… he’s falling. Not rising.

    7. Oooh, I love this.

    10. This cover is AWESOME.

    13. *dies of punnery*

    So many summery cover reveals this week!

    16. THAT PUPPY LOOKS SO SAD. *cuddles the puppy*

    17. BWAHAHAHA

    22. Awe, this is anot as pretty as book one. Haz a sad.

    33. I ADORE THIS COVER.

    34. Looks like a coffee stain on fire.

    36. This is a series redesign I very much approve of.

    CB1. I prefer the hardback as well.

    CB3. Ooo, I don’t agree. I much prefer the new one. The original is kind of ugly in person.

    CB4. The US one is fugly. The German one is awesome.

    WTF1. AHAHAHAHA WTH IS THIS? WHY IS THIS?

    I totally agree with Debby!
    Gillian recently posted…Do Authors Owe Readers Anything?My Profile

  9. 3. The “rise” of Mallory. Hehe. He doesn’t really look like a Mallory, though.

    10. I definitely want to know why Marilyn has a gun. “It’s over, Joe. BAM.”

    14. And apparently once you meet them, you must greet them like
    Tarzan.

    18. I like that she has freckles.

    20. This looks like the most interesting out of all three books, which is frustrating because I abandoned the series after the first one.

    22. That is nowhere near as pretty as the first book. DISAPPOINTING.
    Shae/Shelver @ Shae Has Left The Room recently posted…Cover Love #40My Profile

  10. Alessandra says:

    Favourite cover of the week: The Cheesecake Queen, for the yum factor.

    The Crash Into You cover with the couple from the Obsidian series is terribly confusing.

  11. Wheeeee, Cover Snark Day! And boy, is this a day the world needs the fun, jolly times of Cover Snark.

    3. I bet the model had plenty of fun posing for that. Also, his face bothers me so much.

    5. I heard the book is pretty abysmal, but it’s a pleasing enough cover and I dooooo love me some pretty veils…

    8. He’s probably delivering air, seeing as she’s wearing so much cloth that she’s stuck on the bench. Oxygen tanks and masks? Pfft, who needs those when there are air-giving smooches to be had?

    10. Pretty cool cover, but the premise has me cracking up and staring in awe in equal measure. Marilyn the spy(ish person) and a romance with John F. Kennedy!

    12. Too shiny. Ick. Boooooring.

    17. Ilona Andrews gets the worst covers and it makes me feel so sad for them.

    19. I’ll never not hate that font.

    22. HOW DID I MISS THIS? -swoons mightily-

    27. Whoever had to tie the iPod cable like that probably had to Google “I’m so sorry it’s for a book cover okay” right after Googling “how to tie a noose” so the person watching over their searches didn’t get alarmed. I knew my possible search person (I like to think it’s a man named Melvin) is regularly facepalming at my searches.

    30. Don’t you just hate when you go to a wall to be touristy and there’s a floating head in the way?

    35. LABELMAKERSSSSSSSS. Oh my God, I had so much fun with labelmakers as a kid. My parents would have to hide them from me so I wouldn’t use them all up or break them.

    37. It reminds me of the covers for those books like Lisa M. Stasse too. The Forsaken and all those. This one is less techy and more foresty, though.

    39. IT’S IN MY STYLE *AND* MY COLOR. -snatches- Am I a terrible person for noticing how thoroughly defined her breasts are? Because they’re very, very there and very circular.

    1. On the bright side, very few people will be complaining that the hardcover doesn’t match the rest of the series, if any. They seem committed to sticking with that design but wanted to tweak it.

    1. I’m thinking this came from the same photoshoot as the cover for Onyx (it seems like it would be the same image but most likely isn’t) but they did some serious Photoshopping on it.

    2. This is the one I hate least because the color is sort of pretty and their pose is cheesy-good, but it’s still hilariously terrible.
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  12. Jasprit says:

    I honestly don’t like the Crash into You cover, I thought the lady model was somebody new, but it does look like the model that he always appears with! And doesn’t the model on Confused look a bit like Lindsay Lohan? I had to do a double take. I can’t believe some of these covers, gorgeous covers are always my biggest downfall, so I know I would reject a lot of these if I ever saw them in the bookstore! Thanks for sharing this great post with us Christina! 🙂
    Jasprit recently posted…Review: Finding Cinderella by Colleen HooverMy Profile

  13. Saji Connor says:

    The cheescake queen cover is so cute and I also like The line cover 🙂
    Have a great weekend! xoxo
    Saji Connor recently posted…TAG: 99 Random QuestionsMy Profile

  14. Heather says:

    I wish I was The Cheesecake Queen. The monarchy has never been so delicious.

    Ugh, I hate when people are snobby about sex! I have the same questions as you about this book 🙂

    I love the Origami Yoda covers! The new one is so cute.

    Released is sooo pretty!

  15. Angie F. says:

    1. This cover seems really busy. I still need to start Percy Jackson…

    4. I would expect something that pops more from Bollywood.

    8. I’m pretty bored of underwater covers.

    21. I’m trying to figure out what she’s wearing, but I am intrigued by this title.

    27. I like it.

    38. Why are Richelle Mead’s covers always so terrible?!

    Battles
    1. Hardcover

    2. Hardcover! Even though I didn’t like the book, this is still one of my favorite covers this year.

    4. I actually don’t like any of them.

    WTF.

    1. So that’s the cover everyone was talking about! LoL
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  16. #2 Looks like the title and cover of a Sarah Addison Allen book. And I love it! I need to find out more about this book.

    #9 But this is in a lake at a summer camp. So there would be no sharks. 😉 I love this cover. I love water. Yeah.

    #20 You are so funny. I am SO tempted to read this because I want to know how things end but there is no way in hell after the way the last one ended.

    #22 Agree about the font. Wherever this is, I want to go there and bundle up in front of the fire with some hot cocoa and a book while it snows outside. YES.

    #33 This is my favorite of the week. This is what I would choose if I was picking this week by far. WHOA.

    WTF1. Yeah, it’s them. She must be wearing a wig. I am so sick of them on every cover. ENOUGH already.

    DEBBY picked the cover I would have picked. High five, girl! I promise I didn’t peek!
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  17. pabkins says:

    Sadly I’m not impressed with any of them.
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  18. Lynn K. says:

    1. Percy Jackson’s Greek Gods – Love the art style but it looks a bit cluttered. Hm..

    5. The Collection – She looks like the actress for Girl With a Dragon Tattoo!

    17. Clean Sweep – Pity the inn wasn’t included in the background.

    22. Between the Spark and the Burn – LOVED the cover for the first book. But this? Eh. :/

    26. Endless – Waaaaay to much negative space.

    31. Illusive – Love this one! Pretty colors and art. Superheroes seem to be the new thing.

    33. The Line – For some reason I thought Diviners when I saw this. Still so bitter over Lair’s cover ugh.

    38. The Immortal Crown – Really like the new design. Much more than the original for book one anyway. Looking forward to see what they come up for Gameboard. It can’t be worse.

    Cover battles

    1. The Bone Season – DO NOT LIKE. The original was perfectly fine. WHY?!

    2. Hysteria – Both are nice!

    4. After Eden – I like the UK cover!

    WTFs

    1. Crash Into You – Ugh, ugh, ugh. US design wins, hands down. I’m glad they redesigned the UK PTL to match but really, they should have just stuck with the US designs. MiraINK is so inconsistent!

  19. 1. Meh.

    2. Eww. I hate cheesecake. But this is probably because I hate cheese and I’m allergic. Blerg.

    3. This looks like a Percy Jackson trailer. I’m not sure why. It’s also not bad for self-pub.

    4. Where can I get a pair of them shades? (Dollar Store buy)

    5. Meh.

    6. Ew. Look at her leg. It’s doing weird things photoshopped next to the grass.

    7. Pretty colors!

    8. Meh. But I like her dress.

    9. I really like the font on this.

    10. Oh, I like this one a lot. It’s fierce.

    11. I don’t particularly like that she’s smoking on the cover. That implies good sex? Really? Never heard of this. Otherwise it’s a nice image.

    12. BOOOOO! Then again, none of the covers in this series impress me much. Read: AT ALL.

    13. Boring

    14. Again, bland and boring. But maybe that’s the look they are going for.

    15. There’s no kissing on the cover for a book about kissing?! Is this real life?

    16. Hahaha. I didn’t even notice the puppy until I read your comment. Why is that puppy even there?? It’s like they added him in at the last possible second.

    17. The artwork is pretty. I love the shading that’s done.

    18. Face cover. They never really do much for me.

    19. I was never a fan of the redesigns for this series. But I didn’t like the original for book one either. So hard to please, I am.

    20. This looks so emo. I don’t know why this reminds me of 8 Mile, though. Heh.

    21. This confuses me. I don’t know what the cover is trying to say, but the blurb implies that she just has certain rules when it comes to sex? I don’t know why that has to translate to this cover. Ah, because sex sells.

    22. UGH. Let us not speak of it.

    23. Oh, it’s a novella cover. It’s a shame how I can tell without even looking at the title.

    24. Ooookaaaay.

    25. It’s kind of boring for me, but I do like the idea of Braille. Anyway, I suppose that’s the point of it not being very eye-catching.

    26. Meh.

    27. Oh, I actually really love this cover. I even downloaded this one of EW. 😀

    28. LOL at your commentary.

    29. WHHHHAAAA?

    30. I hate the overlay technique done here. Though, I generally always hate when it’s done on covers because it looks so cheesy!

    31. I like the colors used here, but not sure if it’s a favorite cover of mine. I am excited for this book.

    32. Interesting concept. Reminds me of all the paper cranes my husband leaves around the house for me and the kids.

    33. That’s pretty cool.

    34. BAHAHA. A Dirty Little Table. Oh, Christina.

    35. I need this book in my life. Origami Yoda #5?! Now I need to find 1-4.

    36. These covers actually look so much better in person.

    37. This reminds me of the Forsaken covers too. I think it’s pretty cool!

    38. I was surprised when I saw this cover because it was such a changed from the first. Not sure how much I like it. It’s okay, I guess.

    39. UGH. Can we have overlays die??

    40. Meh.

    CB1. So they didn’t stick with the white? Or was that just the ARC covers? I like the hardback too.

    CB2. I like both, but prefer the paperback.

    CB3. I really like the redesign. The silver is foil in person, I think. Or something like it and it really stands out. I hope they kept the designs on the pages because that was really cool. Such a shame I heard the book wasn’t that awesome.

    CB4. Oh finally someone gave this book a decent cover! Well done, Germany! Also, I kind of like the UK cover. US, learn from them.

    WTF1. HEHEHE. Oh, look. It’s the Onyx cover in reverse!
    https://www.goodreads.com/book/photo/13047090-onyx
    Yes, that is the same couple. They just flipped them and photoshopped her hair. It’s the same hair caught in the wind. LOL. Oh and change of clothes.

    WTF2. *Sigh*

    WTF3. The zombie looks too alive to be a zombie.
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  20. katelynn pinson says:

    One of my author friends directed me to your post…lol and I see that my cover is on here! If you read the first book you’ll get that V doesn’t sleep with the same person two nights in a row…you’ll know what I mean if you ever decide to read! :p And I don’t smoke or particularly like smoking either…but I just loved this image and to me, it’s fitting to the character.
    Anyway! Great post…will be following your blog xoxo.

    -Kate Lynne

  21. kara-karina says:

    My God, that cover of The Line is gorgeous! I’m totally hooked 🙂
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  22. Lyn Kaye says:

    2 – Who would ruin cheesecake with peppermint!?
    18 – BWAHAHA!
    35 – Is this series ever going to end?!
    38 – HER HAIR IS ON FIRE SAVE HER

    (I am so far behind on Cover Snark 🙁 )
    Lyn Kaye recently posted…Stacking the Shelves #65My Profile

  23. abuckley23 says:

    29. That’s my book 🙂

  24. […] It’s Cover Snark time! There are some great ones this week, and do you know this is the 77th Cover Snark? WOW. Rachel at Rachel Reads blogged about John Green’s bookish tweets yesterday that upset […]

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