Cover Snark (57): In Which a Cover Is Revealed on TV for Some Reason

Welcome to Cover Snark, where the people are snarky and the covers quiver in fear. Since I don’t write many snarky book reviews here on A Reader of Fictions, Cover Snark is my outlet. If you click on the title of the book, where possible, I’ve linked to Goodreads. Clicking on the cover itself will show you the cover in a larger size, in most cases. Feel free to love covers I hate and vice versa. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

The polls aren’t present this week, because I’m so annoyed with the crappy ones that go to another page. A move to WordPress will happen sometime in the future, so they’ll definitely be back then. A public outcry will bring back the crappy polls though. Depends how much it matters to you guys!

Shiny and New:

1. Maverick – Anna Cruise

Thoughts: That font makes me think of the Speed movies for some reason. Oh, right, because it’s very similar. That’ll do it. Also, that tagline. Bahahaha. I can’t. What do you say, Keanu?

2. Once We Were (The Hybrid Chronicles #2) – Kat Zhang

Thoughts: “I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?” Yes, because whelmed is how I feel about this.

3. Wild Cards (Fullriders #1) – Simone Elkeles

Thoughts: Kissy-faces and football. I would have preferred a card game theme. Who’s with me?

4. Act Like You Love Me (Accidentally in Love #2) – Cindi Madsen

Thoughts: These people are horrible actors. She thinks he’s an ass and he’s obviously whispering to her about how he’s going to murder her after this photo shoot. Also, amore? Why put that in Italian? I even read the blurb and no one’s overtly Italian. This puzzles me. It’s not like the tagline is cuter this way.

5. Never Fade (The Darkest Minds #2) – Alexandra Bracken

Thoughts: This, on the other hand, would be what underwhelmed feels like. Also, it looks a bit like The Testing, which isn’t a cover I was a fan of in the first place.

6. Sky Pirates (The Chronicles of Light and Shadow #3) – Liesel Schwarz

Thoughts: I do love these covers. Blue font may make this my favorite. I just love the color blue, okay. Her tiny hat still makes me giggle.

7. Shadowdance (Darkest London #4) by Kristen Callihan

Thoughts: Their poses. I am having difficulties getting past the ridiculousness of them. And her little jacket looks like it’s made of pleather or something. The clock is kind of cool, though, but I would like less yellow and less pouting.

8. Her Ladyship’s Curse (Disenchanted & Co. #1) – Lynn Viehl

Thoughts: Tit-lamps: useful for distracting straight dudes or lesbians with your assets, while also brightening the surrounding area.

9. His Lordship Possessed (Disenchanted & Co. #2) – Lynn Viehl

Thoughts: Tit-lamps come on a handy chain and can be changed into a fashionable wrap bracelet, if you get tired of people staring at the ladies.

10. Hell Bent (Broken Magic #1) Devon Monk

Thoughts: Oh snap. Is he about to kill that lady? RUDE.

11. Forever Too Far (Too Far #3) – Abbi Glines

Thoughts: The love story of Muscle McDolphinTattoo and Blondie MacSweaterPuppies. This love will surely be eternal.

12. Casted – Sonya Loveday

Thoughts: The fact that I cannot freaking read the text above that book frustrates me. Grrrr. I’m a reader, so I like for words to be READABLE.

13. Spellbound – Sylvia Day

Thoughts: “Her desire becomes his pleasure . . .” Fuck that. Why does her desire become HIS pleasure? What about HER pleasure?

14. Fear of Falling – S.L. Jennings

Thoughts: I suppose that if you’re afraid of falling, the floor is probably a good place to be.

15. Don’t Bite the Bridesmaid – Tiffany Allee

Thoughts: Looks a little more like she’s about to bite him. Also, I now know what was up with the weird plant arms on that Armentrout cover. Apparently it’s part of the Covet branding. What I don’t get is WHY. The fang T in Bridesmaid is campy, but kinda cute. The title and tagline make the vampire sound like a misbehaving puppy.

16. This Love – Nazarea Andrews

Thoughts: Dat ass.

17. Kenobi (Star Wars EU) – John Jackson Miller

Thoughts: Tee hee, if you tilt your head the two dots and the lightsaber make a face. :\

18. Just Breathe – Rachel Campbell

Thoughts: I think someone’s about to let out a breath she just realized she was holding! Also, why does she have a flock of birds in her arm?

19. Losing Hope (Hopeless #2) – Colleen Hoover

Thoughts: *snores* This cover’s just really bland.

20. The Royal Ranger (Ranger’s Apprentice #12) – John Flanagan

Thoughts: This reminds me of the Falling Kingdoms cover.

21. The Drowning – Rachel Ward

Thoughts: Ironically, the girl on the cover of a book called The Drowning isn’t drowning, but there are innumerable covers not about literally drowning girls with drowning girls on the cover.

22. Sabrina the Teenage Witch The Magic Within, Volume 3 – Tania del Rio

Thoughts: Words cannot express how much this doesn’t look like Sabrina the Teenage Witch to me.

23. Behind Closed Doors – Lisa Renee Jones

Thoughts: What is her hair doing?

24. A Castle of Sand (A Shade of Vampire #3) – Bella Forrest

Thoughts: Okay Creations is doing something cool where they’re showing the component images that go into the cover. There are even more up on their FB page! I don’t love this cover, but it’s interesting to see it come together. The background, while pretty, is a little bit Lisa Frank. Half-naked dude is, well, half-naked dude, and the title filigree seems a bit over the top.

25. Storm Watcher – Maria V. Snyder

Thoughts: Pretty. Better than her covers with people on them.

26. The King’s Guard – Rae Carsonย 

Thoughts: Pretty, but boring.

Cover Battles:

1. Allegiant (Divergent #3) – Veronica Roth

US vs. UK: The US cover is pretty enough, though I really don’t think it merited the brouhaha of a reveal on a news program teens probably don’t watch. The UK cover definitely loses for me, because what’s with the feathers? Did Tris turn into an angel somewhere along the way? Because she sure wasn’t in Divergent. My Pick: US.

2. Rose Under Fire (Code Name Verity #2) – Elizabeth Wein

Canadian vs. US: Oh, Canada friends, do you want to send me a copy of the book with your cover because OMG PRETTEH. The US cover is odd to me. It might make sense once I read the book, but right now I’m confused by the fence and the scarf. My Pick: Canadian.

3. Song of the River (The Storyteller Trilogy) – Sue Harrison

Avon vs. Open Road Media: This battle isn’t even fair. Open Road’s breathing new life into this book with a new cover and a republication. I think this is lovely, though the eye does look a bit skewed to me. My Pick: Open Road.

4. Kinslayer (The Lotus War #2) – Jay Kristoff

US vs. UK: The US cover has a badass dragon. Holy shit. Even better, that’s a fucking heroine right there. She’s got blood on her face and is ready to slice your shit up. Love it. The UK cover of Kinslayer isn’t working as well for me as the first, because the yellow really isn’t setting off that blue in a good way. Also, I think the US covers capture the series better.

5. United We Spy (Gallagher Girls #6) – Ally Carter

US vs. UK: Awww, both are pretty cute and well-suited to what I imagine the series to be. US wins for me for having the adorable spine and because she’s graduating, which is super sweet for the final cover.

WTF of the Week:

1. Paradox – Robyn Pierce

Thoughts: Problem the first: the title and font treatment. Problem the second: picking a stock cover image already on a number of covers. Problem the third: thinking that blurring everything will improve said stock cover.

2. Secrets of the Moon – Kristy Centeno

Thoughts: The secret is that in the moon her head swells to twice the size.

3. First Kiss (Heavy Influence Trilogy #1) – Ann Marie Frohoff

Thoughts: Once he met the girl next door, it was all about the duck face.

Outstanding Cover of the Week:
Kinslayer by Jay Kristoff

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30 responses to “Cover Snark (57): In Which a Cover Is Revealed on TV for Some Reason”

  1. 2. This. I liked the first cover better, not a big fan of how grainy the edges are around the faces.

    5. Yikes. Not a fan of the title nor the cover, very much underwhelmed by this.


    Love love the Kinslayer cover! It’s AMAZING. I am here for badass Asian heroines and dragons? OH YES.

  2. 2. I’m really disappointed with this one. I was expecting better >.<
    3. It’s hard to tell if this is part of Elkeles’ other trilogy or not. Yes, a card game theme would have been better!
    8 & 9. Bahahahahaa. Dying. The tit-lamp was too much for me.
    11. Normally I approve of stubble, but his needs a trim.
    13. Vomit.
    17. :\
    18. “I think someone’s about to let out a breath she just realized she was holding!” HAHAHAHHA.
    25. I didn’t even know Maria was bringing out a new book. I am a failure.

    The US Kinslayer cover DEFINITELY wins. I haven’t read STormdancer yet, but I neeeeeed to get my hands on the US cover. And when I do, they’ll probably do a redesign because the gods hate me.

  3. 1. I loved Speed. Speed 2 not so much. Also not digging this cover.

    2. Yes! 10 Things I Hate About You!

    4. I think the Bliss covers are habitually terrible and unless they are side by side I feel like I’m looking at the same cover reveal a million times.

    5. Pretty but not special. It is a lot like The Testing though, but without the THG feeling.

    8. LOL. Good thing I already finished my coffee this morning!

    11. This cover is so washed out it’s painful to look at!

    19. I feel like he’s looking at me a bit creepily.

    21. Yeah that’s not Sabrina at all!

    24. Man I loved Lisa Frank! Everything was always so pretty! I love seeing this process, it’s pretty cool to see how it came together.

    CB1. Ok 1 – revealing the cover on a news program makes no sense to me and was complete overkill. 2 – The cover is ok but I’m not a fan of red/orange and I feel like all the covers lately are using red/orange colors and I want it to stop! 3 – US for the win.

    WTF 1. Not a fan of blurred anything, makes me think that something is wrong with my contacts!

    WTF 2. That head so clearly does not belong on that body. Very awkward looking!

  4. Megan K. says:

    1. All those veins. >.< 2. I actually really like this cover, but I prefer the first one better. I like how both the covers match, though. 3. The “vintage effect” is quite nice here, but nooooo another kissy-face cover for NA. Where’s the originality, guys?! 4. THE GIRL’S EXPRESSION. She’s like, “His breath… Stinks. Just gonna act cool until I can get away.” But yeah, that tagline – and title, for that matter – sucks.

    5. I wasn’t the only one who saw the similarities! I kind of like this, though like #2, I prefer the first one better.

    8. *chokes on water at your comment*

    12. I’m afraid that vapor-dress/article of clothing is going to slip down too far and we’ll be able to see.

    13. Apparently, the pleasure of females in BDSM literature don’t matter anymore.

    18. HER EXPRESSION. More duck face, ugh.

    22. What happened to you, Sabrina? Where’s all the innocence? *weeps*

    23. I think she’s supposed to be lying on the bed. The designers just tilted her around or something.


    Out of the three, #3 bugs me the most. I thought only girls did duck faces. I can’t imagine anyone ever wanting to kiss that guy. Idiotic expression.

    YES. Kinslayer definitely wins! That series has one of the best covers, ever.

  5. Riv says:

    That guy with the duckface on WTF3 cover is, really, quite priceless ๐Ÿ˜€ Sometimes you think what ever might go through people’s heads when they make certain decisions.

  6. I can’t even…. *breaths* *wipes away the tears*

    OK, composed…

    6- that looks like a shitty photo shop job.
    11- Are those strappy things part of her bra? * ashamed I noticed that*
    15- Hot mess
    17- totally tilted my head…

    WTF of the week #2 *dies*

  7. KM says:

    I agree about just being “whelmed” with the Kat Zhang cover. It was okay. Looked too much like the original IMHO. And I actually really like the ALLEGIANT cover, but I agree that revealing it on TV was weird…

  8. I love it all. I think I’m going to think of the 10 Things I Hate About You quote when I look at covers from now on and just judge by -overwhelmed, underwhelmed, and whelmed.

    Another awesome Cover Snark!

  9. 2. I totally admit to my fangirl getting in the way of now I view this cover because I love it. The faceplay entertains me. ๐Ÿ˜€ I’m also honestly surprised this didn’t get a redesign because I had no idea how they’d pull off a similar cover. What’s Left of Me’s cover came off as a one-shot they’d have to do over before book two!

    3. CARD GAMES? -resists Yu-Gi-Oh joke (I’ve been watching the abridged series, okay? Shut up)- Because I love my football I’d totally read this… Had the author not been an ass over a review whose fake interview with the reviewer was a clear parody.

    5. I kinda like this one because it’s so clear, but now that you mention it, it DOES look a lot like The Testing.

    7. He should be doing the boobs-and-butt pose.

    11. -flips off book on principle-

    12. Why is she farting words, Ms. Christina?

    16. I have no comment other than that YOUR comment made me laugh IRL.

    22. The art looks nothing like her, I agree! It’s also so ridiculous with that pose and her face and the dude that I kind of like it. Wait, no I don’t because I looked at the other cover and WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH SALEM?

    24. I can’t even properly admire what the designer is doing with this cover reveal (because that’s cool) because this particular author seems to be using her readers as spam machines. They get giveaway entries for reccing the book to people. Dude, if readers like a book, they’ll rec it and create buzz on their own. Don’t dangle carrots in front of their face to make them do it. :/

    26. Agreeed. Very pretty purple but really, really boring.

    2. I should have expected the cool cover to not be the US cover. ๐Ÿ™ I got a paperback of Code Name Verity last week and it didn’t match one bit, after all. I kinda like the US cover because it gets the same sense of everyday life + war planes (which kind of were part of everyday life too during the war), but the Canadian one is so much prettier. I might just order the Canadian one from the Book Depository if they have that edition.


    3. Quack quack. Looks like a movie poster but with much more fail.

  10. Del Rey always has awesome covers so I’m not really surprised Chronicles of Light and Shadow look so good (too bad the books aren’t all that memorable). The others are just dreadful, some actually made me shudder.

    And the two dots and the lightsaber make a face! That totally made my day. *g*
    I prefer the US cover of Kinslayer too, but sadly I’ll be getting mine from Tor UK, so I should just shut the hell up and be happy about it. I DID whine a bit, but I’m over it now. Totally over it. Well, maybe not.

  11. Kayla Beck says:

    2. I’m so tired of partial/broken faces.

    4. Her teeth are killing me. Maybe that and amore is supposed to signify that she’s of European descent? Wait, was that ugly? o.O

    6. Is that a tiny hat or goggles?

    8. I want that dress. I’d like to go somewhere on vacation where I can dress like that until I get frustrated with the heat and skirts.

    12. I planned on sneaking a book into my cousin’s graduation on Saturday, and now I have to worry about naked gingers slinking out of the pages. *sigh*

    17. I am tempted to buy this just so I can justify having his sexy face somewhere on my bookshelf. Well, I’ll have to pretend it’s beardless, but still.

    21. She’s the best treader of water EVAH!

    22. More 80s porn!!! This should be the cover of 50 Shades of Grey!

    CB1. Oh, I missed the cover reveal while I was mucking through suckdom? Excuse me while I go cry myself to sleep. /sarcasm

    CB4. Ever since it was called a demon penis on Cuddlebuggery, I can’t take that sea dragon seriously. Nor do I want to. ๐Ÿ˜€

    WTF2. I think she can also twist her head 180 degrees.

  12. Gilly says:


  13. Amy says:

    Okay, making this a quick one! start time 12:40pm

    1. His chest looks more like a boob than a toned man chest. It’s quite distracting really.

    3. Yes, I do see why you would be thinking cards. A football team can get a wild card for playoffs though, so I think that’s what it means… maybe. Still kissy.

    6. I find that steampunk covers tend to be well done most of the time. I really like that one.

    8. A whole new version of headlights!

    9. Awesome, removable too!

    10. I’m guessing she will shoot him first, then they will get all freaky and fall in love. Isn’t that typically what happens in books like that?

    11. Do bras really come with over the boob straps too? I guess I don’t have big enough ones to worry about holding them in.

    13. Seriously, that’s so sexist. Pleasure goes both ways. If not it’s not getting done right.

    15. She’s so going to bite him!! On another note, I have this for review and it sounds pretty good.

    18. I think she’s about to blow out the rest of the things on the dandelion, as soon as she realizes she’s holding her breath.

    19. The first one was so pretty. I wish this one wasn’t so blah!

    21. What’s on her chest? That’s completely distracting me from the rest of the cover.

    Cover Battles

    1. US cover is better, but I am still thrown off by the “iant” ending instead of “ent”. I don’t care if they sound the same, it’s weird.

    4. Ohh they are both awesome, but I think I like the US one a little better.

    5. I like the US better too.

    WTF of the Week

    1. OMG isn’t that on like 5 million NA covers?

    2. She looks kind of creepy

    3. I really like the cover, except for the expression on his face. It’s odd and totally unattractive.

    Outstanding Cover of the Week

    Yes!! I agree 100% It’s pretty awesome!!

    12:58pm Yes!!!!

  14. GillyB says:

    1. UNTIL HER. Snorted out loud at that one.

    2. I think you can in Europe. (For the purposes of this cover, I, too, am in Europe)

    8. Her nipple is glowing.

    11. UGH.

    12. I HATE THE WORD CASTED. Even though I’m sure it’s a THING in this book, it drives me MENTAL when people in real life ask, “Did you hear who get casted in the movie?” I always end up snarling, “CAST. Who was CASTin the movie God you Phillistine die choking on your own blood.”

    18. Because apparently all covers today are INCOMPLETELY without birds. Also, mouthbreather. If she shuts her mouth, she’ll DIE.

    19. I’m losing hope for these covers. This looks like a pamphlet on teen depression.


    CB 1: I loathe the UK Divergent covers, even though I’m underwhelmed by the Allegiant cover. That factory… thing looks lame.

    CB2: I THOUGHT THE CANADIAN WAS THE US ONE it is sososo much better no fair

    CB4. US. No question.

    WTF 2: Um. I do art. I know proportions. There is something really FUNKY about the size of her head. Also, bags, girl. Get some concealer.

  15. Shelver506 says:

    2. I don’t like the font for the author’s name. But yeah, otherwise it’s all just meh.

    4. I think they were going for alliteration with that amore. Also, the girl kinda looks like a brunette Taylor Swift.

    7. I’ve never understood the whole tucked in unbuttoned shirt thing.

    10. Not if she kills him first. BWAHAHAHA!

    14. For some reason, the first-person tagline bothers me.

    15. I’m now having fun picturing him trying to bite her and her squirting him in the face with a water bottle. “No! Bad vampy, bad! We don’t bite!”

    17. I like the distressed look going on here.

    18. Birds AND dandelion poofs? Yeesh. Pick one or the other.

    19. He’s hopeless, so he’s probably just lying on the floor muttering, “Mope mope mope.”

    21. She’s all messy. When was the last time there was a messy girl on a cover?

    23. Maybe she has hair that comes alive like octopus tentacles or Celia in Monsters Inc. That would be cool.

    25. See, I thought this was boring.

    26. Boring, but who cares? HECTOR!

    CB2. I’m sad Rose Under Fire doesn’t have the same emotional impact as the hands from CNV. Sigh. I really wanted them to match.

    CB4. USAAAAAA!!!! I’m so so so happy this is the cover that will be available over here.

    CB5. I’ve always thought the UK covers were so snazzy, but yeah, US wins it with that graduation gown. Sigh.

  16. Bonnie R says:

    1. hahahah UNTIL HER. DUN DUN DUN… So dramatic.
    2. I agree with you. I get the need/desire to match covers in series but this one seems a bit too similar for my liking.
    3. I was expecting something to do with Poker. Makes more sense.
    5. Yeah, this one reminds me a lot of The Testing. Boring.
    6. This one is really cool and I love the title. Her arm is a strange color though…
    7. Lol I love his pose. Not. His shirts tucked in yet still manages to fall off his shoulder… dumb.
    18. Seriously. Why are the birds there? No point.
    19. He looks bored by his bored look on this bored cover. I’m bored too.
    23. That door is NOT closed.

  17. Bahaha. Everyone, your snark is amazing. I love it. Anyway…
    1. Well. Man-boob. Until her… Let me guess, she said enough as enough and that he couldn’t have bigger breasts than she does. Surgery time.
    2. Whelmed is a good term. A very good term. Is the white aroun her face two more faces? Because I’m definitely feeling like there are at east three lips/and or lip outlines in this picture.
    3. I’m with you. Very much.
    4. What is going on? Also, what’s with big sunglasses? This cover doesn’t interest me in the least.
    5. Hey, there are no kissy faces or blond girls. Cool. But yeah, it is kind of like The Testing. Though I’d say that The Testing cover was more boring. I’d possibly read this.
    6. AIRSHIP! I’m hooked. Love airships (as you may be able to guess since my ‘name’ and blog are both airship related.
    7. How is it that no matter how hard a guy tries, he can’t keep his shirt on? Not cool. Her dress is pretty though… and the background is too.
    8. Her hat. *Gasp* I love it. The rest of the cover is meh, but HER HAT. But, yeah, the lamp is more than a little weird.
    9. Same comment as above minus lamp.
    10. Why is she surrounded by light? Angel! Also, congrats dude on the shirt. Looks better on you than off.
    13. Simple, but dull. Very, very dull. Also that line… What the heck?
    14. I can’t even come up with snark for this. I’m too floored. And not in the positive, I’ll read this tomorrow! way.
    17. You’re right! There is a face!
    18. Good question. Maybe birds are a part of the plot. Or maybe, they’re just preeetttty.
    19. Bland is one word for it. Dull, dull, dull.
    20. Juvenile books have covers that are so much cooler than adult ones.
    22. Sabrina the Teenage Witch at the beach with a hot guy making mooning eyes.
    24. As you said, half-naked dude, and over the top title filigree.
    26. That colour is gorgeous.
    OH MY GOODNESS. The Kinslayer books. Both are amazing. I love the UK cover, but the US cover captures the character and the spirit of the stories better. Also, I feel like Buruu should be on the cover, and he’s not in the UK cover. It’s sad, because I liked the UK cover for the first book better.

  18. 1. I was so obsessed with Speed. lol I would watch it every day that summer, after it went on VHS (cringes with how old that makes me sound).
    2. I like this. I think it is interesting and fits with the theme of the other book well.
    12. I love the colors and background. And I love the effect with the words and book. There’s something so fake looking about her back. As you get closer to the sheet it looks too photoshopped and lost the curves and planes it needs. IDK. lol
    Cover battles:
    1. Teens were probably at school at the time of the reveal, which is too bad.
    2. DEFINITELY the Canadian cover!
    4. LOVE the US cover! The leaves bother me a bit on the UK one.
    1. It hurts my eyes to look at, for many reasons.


  19. Kristin A. says:

    5. Never Fade is sooo much better than The Testing. Whenever I see The Testing Cover it looks like a condom on the cover until you blow it up full size. Love, love, love the US cover for Kinslayer it has so much going on. The Sabrina The Teenage Witch cover is awful and looks nothing like the animated version or hell even the TV show.

  20. Lyn Kaye says:

    Kingslayer makes me want to cry. I love it.xx

    Did I miss the poles this week? I love voting on my favorite covers!

  21. Ok Cupcake, I need glasses because the tiny hat you mentioned on Sky Pirates ..well I thought they were aviator goggles!!!!!! You know I have mad love for these posts, I am back to drooling! Oh and I cannot wait for book two of Darkest Mind..but the cover is meh ๐Ÿ™

  22. Jaime Lester says:

    12- it looks like she is pooping out the spell onto the page. That ain’t right

  23. Pabkins says:

    So not digging the Wild Cards cover – BLAH!
    Once we Were – whelmed …well just well what! more i need more! – maybe that described my reaction to the first book haha

    Sky Pirates – I have a tiny hat like that!

    Her Ladyship’s Curse – what the freak! No no – haha *kicks with glee about titlamps*

    Fear of Falling – yes crawl on the floor lol

    Star Wars Kenobi – I seriously did tilt my head for that one!

    The King’s Guard – yeah boring and looks like psychadelic vomit almost but in a monochromatic scheme

    Allegiant – I’m so very not blown away. I understand the theme going on with the cover art – but the madness from the reveal – I just don’t get it….yeah laundry detergent haha…I prefer cover for book 2

    KINSLAYER!!! – LOVE LOVE LOVE and piddle myself with glee over the US cover. Uk cover? WTF – its so just not cohesive. That lovely bakcground and they just I don’t know could have done something better with the central image. THe model and the color of yellow splash doesn’t seem to work well enough – if they would have dragged the color around more it would have binded it all together. HELL YEAH THATS RIGHT COVER OF THE WEEK.

  24. Judith says:

    2. Hmmm. I loved the first cover. This is just… okay.

    3. Cheesy high school romance turned zombie novel? Weird.

    6. Cute and original! Funny, the only thing that I DON’T like is the font treatment. It doesn’t really seem to match the rest.



    10. Has no one ever told you that you’re not supposed to shoot girls?!

    11. Hey look, it’s a Jersey Shore book.

    14. No, I think she already fell and is now in shock. Or dead.


    18. “Just Breathe, or Living for Dummies”

    21. Can someone shoot the green font? It’s not Shrek.

    Cover battle 1. The US cover reminds me of Pokรฉmon, but I HATE the UK covers.

    Cover battle 2. I’m so disappointed that neither of these matches the Code Name Verity covers.

    WTF 3. Dude, what is your hair doing?

  25. Kailia Sage says:

    I am so glad I came across your blog. I laughed the entire time reading this book but “The love story of Muscle McDolphinTattoo and Blondie MacSweaterPuppies. This love will surely be eternal.” is princess!

  26. melanie says:

    #4. “and the secret word is…douchebag”
    12. If you didn’t tell me the title, I wouldn’t have been able to read it.

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